Skip to main content

Political Correctness Run Amok

Before we go any further, I've got a question. What the heck is a mok anyway?

*Googles*

Let's see, the #1 ranked item is the Urban Dictionary and that says...

*Giggles*

Hmmm... no kidding?

Wait a minute is that my picture?

Oh, are you still here? Sorry I got sidetracked there. I wanted to get back to the topic at hand, the subject of today's injustice, our weekly Humor Blubberers Dot Com diatribe: political correctness. And today's question: has it run, urm, er, amok?

You know, I was willing to go along when people got offended by things like "the little lady" usually used in a sentence with "in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant" (those were the days) but now people have their politically correct radars on 24-7 and that's such a freakin' injustice.

News comes this week that political correctness has finally run amok. The U.S. Supreme court has refused to hear a case launched by Native Americans that the name of the NFL's Washington franchise is racist. (I guess their mommas didn't raise any fools.) Redskins? What's racist about that...it's a homage to the proud Native American Indians. Oh wait a minute, Native and Indian is redundant...but it's not racist. See what I did there? Now Rednecks would be racist. That'd be a slam against dumb, white-trash, trailer park people. And the NFL wouldn't do that. Hell, that accounts for half their demographic. Besides, it's not their name but their 3-6 record this season that's offensive!
An inflatable sphere made from the outer covering of a donut-eating human in a blue uniform.


But where does this stuff stop? People are upset with the MLB's Atlanta team - the Braves. Would they have us call them the Cowards. No, that would offend milquetoast, lilly-livered, teeny-weineyed wimps everywhere and we couldn't have that. They account for the majority of steroid-bulked up players too scared to play straight. How about...


Atlanta's 3rd sweater proving popular.

Political correctness isn't limited to sports. Oh, no. Since the Christmas season is almost upon us I thought I'd perform a little public service (you leave my mok out of this) and remind everyone we can't say that word anymore. It's too Christian centric. Now we have to say Happy Holidays. And holiday tree and festive turkey and so on. George Kostanza's Dad on Seinfeld had the right idea. He got rid of Christmas and substituted it with Festivus for the rest of us!



And if you're worried about what to sing at Chris... (damn) the holidays Ezine@rticles has a long list of what used to be Christmas Carols. But since that would offend all Christians named Carole we'll just have to call them holiday humables (catchy!). Here's my Top Five:

We Wish You a Merry Christmas
We Wish You A Merry Non-Religious-Specific Day Off In Winter

Oh Come All Ye Faithful
Oh Come All Ye of Extreme Loyalty To Non-Material Evidence

Little Drummer Boy
Vertically-Challenged Drummer Child of Undetermined Gender

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
I Saw My Gynocentric Guardian Kissing a Non-Gender Specific Person Who Is Known To Wear A Red Suit

Good Christian Men Rejoice
Evil Narrow-Minded Homophobic Racist Misogynist Men Get Drunk and Abusive

And to all a "good night"!

Comments

Don said…
I'm a believer in gun control, i.e. a good, steady shot. Your "little friend" on your sidebar is the perfect solution to political correctness run amok. Those amoks can't be too hard to take down with the a little gun control.
nonamedufus said…
Don: I'm with you Don. I support sleeveless shirts. We should have the right to bare arms.
Me-Me King said…
Wow, I love your PC Christmas carol titles. Very funny!
nonamedufus said…
Me-Me: Thanks. There's a lot more at the link I provided.
Mr. Knucklehead said…
Yeah, the whole sports team controversy is just stupid. What's wrong with the Seminoles? It's respectful, if anything.

Where can I get one of those Cleveland Caucasians jerseys?
Hey, let me the first to wish you a Happy Festivus, NoName! Enjoy the people!
nonamedufus said…
DK: Screw 'em if they can't take a joke.
nonamedufus said…
Mike: Oh, you're the first. And in return let me wish you a mirthful holiday that celebrates conquering American Indians.

Popular posts from this blog

Tales From The Supermarket

Bob and Brenda worked in the supermarket. They weren't check-out clerks. And they weren't stock-boys. Brenda sure wasn't. And they weren't employees who worked in the fish section or the deli. No. They were on the shelves.

They hadn't been on the shelves very long but in that short time they'd developed a considerably close friendship.

The chatted all day when the store was busy and at night when the store was closed. They talked about everything. The talked about what raw products they came from. The talked about their manufacturing processes. And they talked about the long routes in semi-trailers that brought them to this store.

Oddly enough the one thing they never made clear to one another was just what product each of them was.

One day when Brenda was commenting on their friendship she told Bob she was grateful for their amity. "Are you Tea?" said Bob, pekoe-ing her way. "I thought I was Tea". You're coffee!"

This week's Tw…

My Back Pages - November

I read five books last month bringing my year to date total to 61, well past the 50 I estimated at the beginning of the year. And I've yet to get through December.

The month started out with The Nix, the debut novel by Nathan Hill which has been receiving a lot off positive reviews. In it Hill flips back and fourth from the 1968 Chicago protests and 2011 in a desperate search for the truth behind why his mother abandoned him at an early age. In between Hill takes on politics, the media and addiction as well as other aspects of society. It's a well-spun tale and I quite enjoyed reading it.

Next up was the auto-biographical I Am Brian Wilson of Beach Boys fame. This was somewhat of a scattered affair but an interesting read nonetheless. Wilson - or his ghostwriter - however is no Hemingway.

Then it was on to one of my favourite authors, Ian Rankin and his latest tale of now retired Inspector John Rebus, Rather Be The Devil. I never tire of these stories and this is the 21st in …

My Back Pages - 2016

Here, as promised is a month-by-month breakdown of the 67 books I delved into this year. I got off to a strong start and then my intake dwindled for a couple of months until picking back up in April. I'll let you in on my favourites at the end of this list.

January

Here, There and Everywhere:
My Life Recording the Music of the Beatles - Geoff Emerick - ****
H is for Hawk - Helen Macdonald - ***
Close To The Edge - The Story of Yes - Chris Welch - ***
Sweet Caress - William Boyd - ****


February

Purity by Jonathan Franzen 
Still Alice by Lisa Genova.


March

Natchez Burning - Greg Iles
The Promise (Elvis Cole #20) - Robert Crais

April

The Snowman (Harry Hole)- Joe Nesbo ****
Phantom (Harry Hole) - Joe Nesbo ****
The Leopard (Harry Hole) - Jo Nesbo ****


May

George Harrison Reconsidered ***
The Heart Goes Last - Margaret Atwood ****
Dropping The Needle - The Vinyl Dialogues Volume II ***
The Electric Mist with the Confederate Dead, (Dave Robicheaux #6) - James Lee Burke****


June/.July

 Lust and Wonder - Aug…