nonamedufus

We are much alike, Americans and Canadians. We may have different political systems but they are both democracies. And those democracies are both headed by elected leaders each of whom are concerned about the image of their government held "by the people". And yet, we are different. Like Jackson and McCartney our leaders are black and white. One's a liberal, the other a conservative. One is preoccupied with how the media treats him and the other could care less...or so he says. Governments have a love-hate relationship with the media at the best of times. Before they're elected, governments court the media in the hopes of obtaining positive and favourable coverage. After the election it usually doesn't take long for the relationship to change. All of a sudden the government is wary of the media. It's like they've turned out the lights and they're waiting for them to egg their front windows on Halloween. Let me give you an example. In the State...

What do the leaders of Canada, the United States and Iran, a big gun and doughnuts have in common? Stay tuned...all shall be revealed. The United Nations in New York this week was the focus of considerable media attention. A guy who's name hardly anyone can pronounce, and couldn't care less if they do, who last year at the same forum denied the existence of the Holocaust was set to speak again. President Obama, fresh from fishing for compliments via a media saturation blitz, was set to make his maiden UN address. And Canada's PM skipped the whole affair in favour of a coffee and a doughnut, prompting many Canadian news outlets running the story to slug it "Doughnuts (okay, okay "donuts" for you Yanks) over Diplomacy". Obama, to his credit, despite waning public support at home demonstrated he still has the "it" factor internationally. As the Toronto Star editorialized "...Obama cut a bold figure on the world stage yesterday, delivering a ...

Earlier this week President Obama and Prime Minister Harper put their own political controversies behind them and met for just under an hour in the Oval Office. In terms of positive ink and images, the meeting was expected to benefit the Prime Minister far more than the President. > Fresh from his less than successful valedictorian address and his run in with "Jackass" Joe Wilson, Obama was lucky if Harper's visit rated anywhere above negative numbers on the Washington Richter scale. In other words it probably didn't provide Obama with a needed diversion from the previous week's full court press from the media and Republicans. > On the other hand, on the brink of a snap election, the timing of the visit for Harper couldn't have been better. "Mr Harper Goes To Washington" to meet with his good buddy Barack would have been quite the image for the electorate to have in their minds as they trudged to the polls trying to decide who among Canada'...

In Canada we have a commercial that runs at this time of year for Office Depot with the song It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year and I laugh every time I see it 'cause it's the furthest thing from the little rug rats ' minds as mom takes them through the store buying school supplies. This year more than just the kids went back to school. A few politicians entered the hallowed halls of learning. President Obama's trip to the classroom met with mixed reviews. A seemingly innocuous and apolitical speech to 9 th graders about the importance of an education was slammed by his right-wing critics before he even gave it, who accused the White House of political interference and attempting to sway public opinion on the health care debate. Said Florida Republican chair Jim Greer, "President Obama has turned to America's children to spread liberal lies, indoctrinating America's youngest children before they have a chance to decide for themselves....

You know lately I find the real political news funnier than any satire or parody of politics. The funniest thing of all is how the tide of public opinion has turned for Barack Obama. Not so much how as why. The poor guy continues to get a rough ride from right of center America and the "I smell trouble, let's exploit it" American media. First there were the "birthers" who shouted from the rooftops that Obama wasn't born in America. Come on! Of course not, he was immaculately conceived. Now there are those who oppose his health bill and liken him to Hitler, saying Nazi Germany wasn't unlike what Obama's trying to do: turn America into a socialist nation by doing what the Nazis did - taking over the auto industry and the health system. And people believe this stuff. What they forget is if anyone's acting like Nazis they are: purpetrating "the big lie". The funniest part of this whole health "debate" centres around so-called deat...

I know I'm getting old but am I getting stupid? That may be a rhetorical question but nevertheless I used to pride myself on how I kept up to speed on politics in the States and Canada. Things started to unravel, though, when I noticed I couldn't keep up with the vocabulary being used primarily in American politics. No, I'm not talking about the unkind adjectives associated with Alaska's chief exported embarrassment, former Governor and Republican Vice-Presidential skirt wearing, soccer-mom running mate para-sailing, er, um Sarah Palin. It's like the early stages of Alzheimer's, you know: Somes heimer's. And the onset began with the Swift Boat controversy during the 2004 American Presidential election. "Swift boat - now what kind of controversy is that?" I thought at the time. Well it turned out it was a term used by the media to describe a group of Vietnam swift boat veterans publicly questioning John Kerry's military record. Huh? Go figure...

What is it about strapping yourself into a metal hull, donning a fiberglass helmet and hurtling around a race track at close to 200 miles per hour? There's a group of good 'ol boys who every weekend demonstrate to the world their need for speed once the anthem is away, the fly past is flown and some clueless celebrity issues that car racing catchphrase "GENTLEMEN...START...YOUR...ENGINES!!!" Just what the hell am I referring to? Well unless you live under a rock or are a fey fashionista rather than a fast car freak you know I'm talking about the National Association for Stock Car Racing or more simply put NASCAR . According to Wikipedia , NASCAR is one of the most viewed professional sports in terms of television ratings in the United States. In fact, professional football is the only sport in the United States to hold more viewers than NASCAR.. NASCAR holds 17 of the top 20 attended single-day sporting events in the world and claims 75 million fans who purchase ...

It was Will Rogers who once said: "I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts." But the words might well have been uttered by - or for that matter about - former comedian and newly minted U.S. Senator Al Franken. Franken, you see, spent several decades as a writer and cast member of Saturday Night Live the show that forever lampooned the politicians of the day. What are we to expect from the former comic and now Senator from Minnesota? Well, maybe there's a clue to be had from his past. Franken, who spent nearly as much time contesting his election results as he did parodying politicians, in one of his incarnations appeared as self-help guru Stuart Smalley on SNL. Several of his famous catch phrases included: Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me. It's easier to put on slippers than to carpet the entire world Franken also wrote several books, among them the not-s...

The haunting hoopla accorded a certain middle-aged pop star's death recently disturbed me. And it disturbed me on several levels. In terms of a frenzied media it was O.J. on the Los Angeles freeway all over again. Coverage to the point of saturation. Speculation to the point of inanity. Meanwhile, the level of devotion, adoration and idolization amazed me. Thousands were interviewed, millions from his music back-catalogue were sold and BILLIONS tuned in around the world to his memorial. An emotional outpouring on such a level is virtually unprecedented . Who else could have garnered such attention? We can think back to Lady Di's funeral but apart from that nothing comes close. It's odd who we choose to idolize. Why Wacko Jacko ? Why don't we place all our devotional powers in traditional religions and their deities ? Well for Catholics, at least, lapsed and the few remaining, Pope Benny isn't exactly a charismatic figure. Why don't we worship our politicians? He...

People are still talking about the Kung Fu-like reflexes President Obama displayed last week when, in the midst of a television interview, he delivered a fatal blow to a frisky fly. I for one admire the guy. The incident reminded me of a childhood reaction of mine and my buddies to annoying flies. We used to try and catch the buzzing buggers in our hands, shake our clenched fists and then watch them try to fly away with often times hilarious results. The trick to this is to actually catch the fly first and I never could. When I saw the video of Obama I yelled, “He da man, he da man! I mean, how cool is that. The supreme leader of the free world has ninja-like moves that put Chuck Norris to shame. Right on. But the President’s predatory prowess didn’t sit well with everyone. PETA, those putzes for the ethical treatment of animals, condemned the President. In a news release they said: “We support compassion even for the most curious, smallest and least sympathetic animals,” PETA spokesm...

There are few issues more controversial in Canada and around the world than the annual seal hunt that takes place in the waters and on the ice floes off Atlantic Canada. The bloody images, the heated rhetoric, the impassioned defences all combine in a familiar rite that pits governments and sealers against animal rights groups. So begins an article on CBC.ca . For years now the Canadian seal hunt has pissed off people around the world - including attention-seeking pop-star Paul McCartney and his ex-wife, the one-legged model (she said she was anti-sealing, but she didn't have a leg to stand on) - and groups from PETA (Putzes for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) to Greenpeace to the European Union. Every year as seal hunters prepare for their annual cull, Canadians – known worldwide as those polite “eh” saying apologists - take a deep breath and don’t exhale until the seal hunt season is over. Why? They’re waiting for the latest global reaction that craps on Canada as a bunch of ...

Nothing affects Canadians and Americans more than a border issue. No, I’m not talking about the “tinder-box” free trade issue so unsubtly referred to as “Shop American” in the US. We’ll save commenting on that little cross-border relations gem for another time. I’m talking about a literal border crossing issue. This issue has shades of the American Wild West. It has the two key opponents, at least: Cowboys and Indians. At Cornwall, Ontario Canadian border guards vacated their offices and shut down the border crossing because they felt threatened by the Indians at Akwesasne. Akwesasne is an Indian reserve that is a jurisdictional nightmare. Not only does it straddle Canada on one side and the US on the other, but it also sits partially in Quebec, partially in Ontario and partially in New York State. Add the sovereign nation of Akwesasne into the mix and you’ve got more pepperonis than Italy’s pizza parliament. pic Ottawa Citizen The Canadian border personnel vacated their posts after n...

I was reading a news story recently about the value of the Canadian dollar (it was approaching par with it's American counterpart - a rare development) and I couldn't help but wonder if our currency is the laughing stock of international money markets. Not because of it's value, but because of it's name. Think about it. The Brits have their pound. The Japanese their yen and the Americans their dollar. But in Canada we have our " loonie ". That's right, our dollar is named after a bloody bird - and not even an exotic one. Our currency is named after the common Canadian loon. And it's not even paper; it's a coin. Which makes for heavy pockets and purses. Couple this with the fact that the Canadian $2 is only available in coin - it's called the " toonie " - Canada is a nation of men with droopy pants and women with bad backs. My wife recently cleaned out her change purse and found $35 in pennies, nickles, dimes, quarters, loonies and t...

If you had to identify the one thing that truly unites Americans with their northern neighbours, what would it be? The right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness? How about McDonald’s, Arby ’s and Kentucky Fried Chicken? Or maybe it’s that we’re both great democracies? You’d have to be unpatriotic – or an illegal alien – to disagree with that but no that’s not it. Maybe it’s that each of our economies is in a tailspin? Or that we share the world’s longest undefended border? Nope, sorry, it’s none of the above. What really unites Canadians with their American brethren (and sistren ) is their love of beer! Tall-boys, stubbies, quarts, pints, cans, kegs or out of a tap, the nectar of the gods comes in many forms, shapes and sizes. Now Canadians may hold their beer in a stein but they also hold it in high esteem. And they have a very distinct view of the quality associated with American beer. Canadians may be known for their politeness and reserved nature but when it comes to the...

In the midst of the economic debacle that has thrown the very existence of everything from the Big Three automakers in the U.S. to small-town local newscasts in Canada into doubt, it’s heart-warming to see one bright beacon of light in what has become the deep darkness of economic ennui. Of course I speak of that bankable bastion of boobs, butts and beauty the Miss USA Pageant. Born in 1950, the pageant was taken over by that financial guru cum Barnum and Bailey protégé Donald Trump in 1996. Mr. Trump has managed to successfully turn around the popularity and by association the fortunes of the pageant whose previous claim to fame was a twenty year hosting sojourn by Bob Barker beginning in 1967. This year’s pageant is seemingly more famous not because of who won but because of who lost. Poor Carrie Prejean, Miss California, basically lost it all when she went up against celebrity judge Perez Hilton, the gay gossip monger extraordinaire. What sealed her fate was his question respecting ...

Is it the majority of politicians who are corrupt? Or are there just a few who give the rest a bad name? I seem to ask myself this question with increasing frequency, each time the latest “sleazeball’s” questionable activities get splashed across the interwebs. (Perhaps I just answered my own question.) Look at these two guys: Prince Charming with not a hair out of place and Lex Luthor with not a hair. How could two such dissimilar douches be so alike? They’re politicians! South of the border a recent case involving scuzzy activity concerned “Blago”. That’s the name used by the media to describe former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. What was he charged with ? Oh nothing much, just: conspiracy to commit mail and wire fraud and solicitation of bribery. That’s the formal Justice Department complaint that alleges that the governor conspired to commit several "pay-to-play” schemes, including attempting to sell Barack Obama’s vacated Senate seat to the highest bidder. We’re not immu...

Being a Canadian living in the shadow of our neighbours to the south isn’t easy. We do take comfort from time to time while, being bombarded by American television programming, in watching U.S. weather forecasters bemoan another cold front moving down from Canada. Yeah, that’s about the only time Americans are willing to concede Canadian Arctic sovereignty, or even mention us by name! While there are many similarities between us, there are also differences. I’ve decided to launch a series of posts to draw your attention to some of these differences. The posts will appear from time to time and be called, with apologies to Pink Floyd, “US (for obvious reasons) and Them (for less obvious reasons because them is us Canadians)”. You know I’ve heard it said there’s no big difference between us. Canadians, after all, are Americans without the guns. And I'm glad I heard that because it a nice segue into my first post in this series. The following headline on cnn.com caught my eye yesterda...