nonamedufus

Tears continued to drip from his moist eyes, rolled down his cheeks and fell to the pages below.  He loved to read. He read several books a week. But never had he come across such a text as was currently before him. It was such a sad tale, about a woman in the last throws of cancer. The funny thing was she was strong while all those around her were so broken-hearted and weak. Page after page reminded him of her. And his heart ached all over gain. There had been happy days together, sure, but at the news of her fatal disease his sunny skies had clouded over. And she had been the strong one not him. She told him how he'd manage when she was gone. And she was sure he would be just fine. He didn't believe her. "I've got to get a grip" he thought. "It's been five years now." Determined to accede to her last wish that he go on living, a wry smile crossed his lips as he chucked the unfinished tome through the passage way. And with that he took h...

With all the doctors' appointments on the horizon my dance card's getting pretty full. Saw Dr. Boisvert, my kidney specialist, yesterday. He's quite happy overall with my recent test results, save my cholesterol (around 5) and my high blood pressure. He's upped the dosage of my blood pressure medication and prescribed Crestor for the cholesterol. In mid-April he's going to have me do a 24 hour blood pressure monitoring session. Meanwhile, I'm back to see Dr Granger, my GP next Tuesday, and the following day I have an appointment with endocronoligist Dr Lochman at the Riverside Hospital. Book: Memoirs by Brian Mulroney Music: Vagabonds by Gary Louris

Things appear to be going well health-wise. Visited Dr Granger, my GP, a week ago and apart from reporting that I'd come down with a cold, everything seemed okee-dokee. Wednesday last week brought great news from the postman. The SAAQ has finally reinstated my driver's license! So I was able to drive myself to my appointment at the multiple myeloma clinic - the first time I've driven since August. At the clinic, Dr. Atkins found nothing out of the ordinary, save a "crackling" in my lungs, due to my cold. In addition to blood and urine tests, he sent me for a chest x-ray and provided me with a prescription for antibiotics to guard against pneumonia. He also indicated he wanted me to undergo a bone-scan to determine my bone density and if all goes well he'll take me off my monthly pamidronate IV. I must be doing okay because my next appointment is in early May. I went to the Hull hospital for blood an urine tests a week ago, tests that my kidney specialis...

I made my first trip to the CLSC (centre local de services communautaires) yesterday since my last visit 11 months ago. Dr. Atkins at the Multiple Myeloma Clinic has put me back on a monthly IV drip of pamidronate. The drug is used by myeloma patients to strengthen their bones. So I've now begun monthly applications. While there Helene, my cancer nurse, drew blood and will pass along the results to both Dr. Atkins and my GP, Dr. Granger. I'm still waiting to hear from the province on the reinstatement of my driver's license. Dr. Granger filled in the appropriate form and sent it off 3 weeks ago. I called the SAAQ (Quebec's license bureau) yesterday and they told me they were still considering my application for reinstatement. Funny, they were awfully quick to act when they took my license away last August. We were in Toronto last weekend for a quick visit with Jim and Lucille. We had a wonderful dinner Saturday night at a place called Miller's Tavern, preceeded by ...

Well, finally had my General Hospital clinic appointment this afternoon, subsequent to December 7. I'm now officially an out-patient of the Multiple Myeloma Clinic, transferred from the Bone Marrow Transplant Clinic. This is definately a positive development. And I'm doing so well, I don't go back to the clinic for 6 weeks. The doctor is very pleased with my progress: my colour, test results and weight - re: the latter saying I must have had a good Christmas (now at 190 lbs, a full 20 additional lbs since the bone marrow transplant). Indeed, after 3 months, I'm at a stage of my recovery - practically complete - that on average usually takes 4-6 months. Next up, the General will arrange with the Aylmer CLSC for monthly blood work and an IV of pamidronate so as to help protect my bones. So I'm happy. I better start my walking program soon and keep the weight off! Book: Exit Music by Ian Rankin Music: Send in the Clowns - The Very Best of Sarah Vaughan by Sarah Vaugh...

Things have quieted down since the holidays. And, I feel myself getting stronger. I no longer sit around all day in my pajamas (new year's resolution). Went out for lunch this week (first luncheon trip to a restaurant since the transplant in October) with my friend Alec. We had dim sum on Somerset Street. It was great. Haven't been back to the clinic at the General since early December - they keep postponing my appointment. But I feel great, other than getting the chills now and then and a case of dry skin. I've gained some weight - 12 pounds (up to 182) since the transplant. My GP filled in a form and sent it to the province this week, requesting that my driver's license be re-instated. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Maryse's mom is still with us. Jean-Marc and Pierce are back from Panama Monday night and then they all take off home for Kelowna Tuesday. Philippe and Laurel are up from Montreal to see Therese over the weekend before she takes off next week. Fir...

Saw this on the eBaum website, http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/62720/ , and loved it. Its a "demotivational" poster. Kind of made me think of me and the infrequency of my posts. I'm doing well; feeling good; looking forward to the holidays and family get-togethers. Maryse's mom, brother and nephew are all here now. Pierce is enjoying all the snow before we get all that rain Sunday. Next week we're off to Maryse's cousin's for a Pesant/Trudel Christmas. The following week Megan, Selo, Miko and Matt are all expected, for the Bray version, New Year's Day. Life is good; the weather forecast: so-so. Book: This Is Your Brain On Music by Daniel J. Levitin Music: Wintersong by Sarah McLachlan

My first trip out, other than to the hospital, occured Wednesday this week when Maryse and I drove out to Megan's for dinner. We spent some quality time with Miko before he went to bed, had dinner with Megan, and got a chance to chat with new, big, flat screen TV-owner Selo after he got home from work. It was a most enjoyable evening. We got home around 10:30, well past my nightly bedtime of 8:00. I was a little tired the next day, but not too tired to welcome Matt for dinner and a visit Thursday evening. While we talk or text fairly regularly we hadn't seen each other since Meg's wedding in September. It was great to see him. Seeing both Meg and Matt this week also allowed us to nail down holiday plans. I'm really looking forward to having them over for New Year's Day dinner. Maryse's mom arrives tonight from Kelowna for a holiday visit. Philippe joins us briefly from Montreal. And then Jean-Marc and BooBoo arrive next week. Then we're off to Montreal for a...

I visited the folks at the Bone Marrow Transplant Clinic at the Ottawa General Hospital this morning at 9am. Things went swimmingly. Doctor Anstee's very pleased with how I'm eating, how I'm drinking, how I'm peeing, my energy levels and so on. She says my bloodwork shows I'm slightly anemic (funny looking word) but since I'm not tired and have a good energy level they're not worried. My next appointment isn't until early in the new year, and after that I'm being transferred to the Multiple Myeloma Clinic - somewhat of a graduation, says the doctor! She again cautioned that the transplant hasn't rid me 100% of the multiple myeloma, but that it has reduced it significantly according to my creatinin levels. They'll have a better handle on this once they start monitoring my myeloma in 2008. Nevertheless, I'm feeling great - better than before the transplant, and certainly just after - and the doctors are very pleased I'm feeling great. M...

Mid-October and the immediate after-effects of the bone marrow transplant seem like such a distant memory now (thankfully). I feel so much better as Christmas approaches. And I'm getting back to my old habits: reading, music (both listening and buying - gotta love Amazon.ca!), surfing (the internet), blogging and so on. And just when I was getting tired and bored with daytime TV, along comes the Mulroney-Schreiber affair. There's nothing quite like a good political scandal to keep an old political junkie entertained. My taste in food is getting more and more varied: french toast for breakfast; hot dogs for lunch; and real dinners like chicken, potatoes and vegetables. Well, of course I still like tuna salad sandwiches, too! I've gotta work myself up to a Christmas dinner of turkey and all the trimmings. It's like I'm in training. Book: A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini Music: The Last of the Red Hot Burritos by The Flying Burrito Brothers

You know there's nothing quite like recovering from an illness that knocks you flat that makes you think about your mortality and about little things that others take for granted that you relearn or develop the strength to do for the first time. As I begin to regain my strength, this was really a week for that kind of reflection and that kind of development. Some really simple things occured this week. Simple for you, maybe, but for me somewhat momentous. First I had visitors! Yep, Megan and Mikayel came by. Second, they brought me lunch: a loaded down six inch submarine sandwhich with vegetables! (Another first!) Lettuce, tomato and pickle garnished this delicious turkey submarine sandwich. Third, today I had my first shower since mid-October. What a joy. Lest you think I haven't been washing, because of my lack of strength I couldn't stand very long so I've been taking baths. But it's just not the same. I know you'll laugh but you just never know how much you...

It was a positive trip to the Bone Marrow Transplant clinic yesterday, all-round. First, I didn't need a wheelchair, and I felt pretty good after the walk from the hospital entrance to the clinic. (And the walk back to the car for that matter.) Next, the doctor told me how pleased she was with my progress, especially my blood work. Then she told me not to come back for 2 weeks. Yay, a holiday next week! She also said that come the new year, they'd likely transfer me to the Multiple Myeloma clinic (same location but Wednesdays instead of Fridays) where they'd probably monitor me every month to month and-a-half. This means they're pretty much through monitoring my progress post transplant and are now interested in ensuring the myeloma is gone. She's very pleased I no longer have any hip and leg pain and says this is an excellent sign in terms of the results of the procedure. She does say, too, that this doesn't necesarily count as a cure; that it could be more of ...

I visited my kidney specialist this morning, the first time since June. He was very happy with my bloodwork results from the hospital, calling them a vast improvement since the last time he saw me. Back then my kidneys were functioning at around 30 per cent. Today, he was pleased to tell me they're up to 66 per cent. Wow, that's some reversal! On the food front, I've actually graduated to sandwiches and I have an appetite - compared to a week or so ago when I really had to force myself to eat. My favourite is a tuna salad sandwich. Things appear on the up and up! Next step: appointment at the Bone Marrow Transplant clinic on Friday.

That's pretty much what I've been since my transplant. It may sound funny but I feel kinda weak when I'm walking around the house, however as I spend more time on the couch I feel myself getting stronger. Yep, I've been feeling noticeably better; actually started to eat solid food - I had a small bowl of tuna salad for lunch yesterday; the first solid food I've had since my transplant October 11. I've lost a lot of weight and all my hair but I feel myself coming back and it really instills optimism, believe me. Last Friday I had my appointment at the Bone Marrow Transplant Clinic. It was a good and a bad day. First why it was good: the head doctor was very pleased with my blood results, calling them "amazing". It'll still be awhile before they know the true effect on my myeloma, but in terms of recovery from the procedure I'm in the upper percentile. Why it was bad: I'm still rather weak so getting myself all dresssed up and trudging out to...

Did someone get the number of that truck? The one that ran me over, backed up and did it again? Wow, it's been an interesting several weeks. Daily hospital visits that stretch to 4-5 hours. Several extended hospital stays to deal with infection. For awhile there it seemed like I was caught in an endless downward sprial. But I'm happy to say I'm home now, making less frequent hospital visits and feeling much, much better. I have a ways to go yet to build up my strength and work on my appetite, but I'm just so happy to have turned the corner. And soon maybe I'll start reading again and listening to music!

Well we're mid-way through the week and 2 days into daily visits to the hospital. Yesterday I got my PICC line installed (see site at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PICC_line which briefly explains) and my high dose chemo through my spanking new PICC line. All in all spent about 6 hours at the hospital. I'm back on anti-naseua drugs, including dexamethasone, but this drug also gives me insomnia - so I slept poorly last night - and high blood sugur - so my levels have been high since I started checking yesterday and I'm back on the sliding scale of insulin. While Maryse and I have agreed to take a day-to-day approach to all this, we already know the long-term side-effects. Actually, the long-term begins in the short-term: the next 5-10 days. The Pharmacist at the hospital tells us that's when the fun begins: naseua (at both ends!) fatigue and perhaps infection. So there's lots of anti-naseua and anti-infection drugs and gargling 3 times a day with salt-water. Beyond ...

Yesterday Maryse and I went to the Bone Marrow Transplant Clinic at the General Hospital and learned what's in store for me next week and beyond. It all starts next Tuesday at 8am when we go to Admitting. I'm not entering the hospital next week, but will likely have to at some point in the future, as early as a week later due to fever or infection. Next I'll have a PICC line installed (peripherally inserted central catheter) in my arm. PICCs can remain in your arm for between 6 months and a year and facilitate intravenous chemo and other medications as well as the taking of blood samples. This seems the better route to go than regular short intravenous needles each time I need to provide a blood sample, given that I'll be visiting the hospital on a daily basis at the outset, then 2-3 times a week, once weekly and finally once monthly. After the PICC is installed I receive my last and highest dose of chemo - a drug called Melphalan. In clearing out any remaining cancer ...

Yeah, how about that face! I really have one under that beard. It got to the point my hair was falling out so much - both on the top of my head and my face - that I got tired of waking up with a mouth full of hair in the morning - blecchhh! So here's the new me... Thursday I'm off to the hospital to find out more about next week's chemo and stem cell infusion. So I'll share more info after that. Book: The Call of Cthulhu and Other Weird Stories by H.P. Lovecraft Music: Yellowjacket by Stephen Fearing

Try saying that five times, quickly! Otherwise known as stem cell harvesting, the procedure took place yesterday. I arrived at the hospital at 7:30. And by the time I was done it was 3pm. The procedure involves a retreive needle being inserted into one arm from the stem cell harvesting machine and a return needle from the machine being insterted into the other arm. This means you can't move...for six hours! The worst aspect of all of this? As you lie there in a hospital bed, unable to move your arms for 6 hours, you better not have to go pee! The second worst aspect? The inability to scratch! I experienced both these aspects!!! My next trip back to the hospital is for a clinic appointment October 4. Then I get a PICC line implanted the following week, October 10, with the actual stem cell infusion taking place Thursday, October 11. There's an excellent, informative site that I found from the Mayo Clinic at http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/stem-cell-transplant/CA00067 that tak...

Well one of the possible effects of my chemo drug is a drop in my hemoglobin. And, indeed mine dropped, increasing my anemia. My levels dropped from 98 yesterday to 86 today. Normal hemoglobin levels are between 120 and 160. So it's back to the hospital tomorrow for a transfusion - 2 units of blood over 4 hours. This morning's 4 hour hydration session came off without a hitch. Guess who showed up to drive me home - Maryse! Fresh from a day's (and red-eye) flight from Yellowknife via Calgary and Toronto. What a trooper (and sweetie!). The days immediately following the chemo are fairly routine, save for the possibility of nausea. However, the time period I'm apparently most at risk of complications is when my white cells start to decrease significantly. This starts several days after chemo and continues for about 10-14 days. It is during this period that I may be more susceptible to infections and fever. Book: The Way It Works - Inside Ottawa by Eddie Goldenberg Music: ...