Boy talk about good fortune falling into your lap...literally.
Some guy in Palm Beach Florida was out for an evening with the boys at a strip club. He ordered a lap dance. One thing led to another and he got the heel of the woman's shoe in his eye. He sued. He's been awarded $650,000!
You've got to ask yourself a couple of questions. First up, how does a guy getting a lap dance get a shoe in the eye?
Hmmm.
A table dance, maybe.
Hmmm.
It must have been a pretty elaborate lap dance. Usually guys have their eyes elsewhere, other than the lady's feet.
Hmmm.
So, like, maybe the guy didn't like lap dances and was standing on his head to see if it'd help if he looked at things from a different angle.
Hmmm.
Do you think she'd bump and grind her heel into his eye?
Hmmm.
How was it he came into contact with the sole (pun intended) article of clothing this woman was probably wearing.
Hmmm.
Maybe the guy told the stripper "I've got my eye on you".
Hmmm.
Maybe she told him "I think you're gonna get a kick out of this".
Hmmm.
And when he was awarded his settlement in court did the media headline this story "The thrill of lap dancing, the agony of da feet"?
Hmmm.
All I can say is man, why didn't I think of that instead of wasting $10 a week on lottery tickets.
Some guy in Palm Beach Florida was out for an evening with the boys at a strip club. He ordered a lap dance. One thing led to another and he got the heel of the woman's shoe in his eye. He sued. He's been awarded $650,000!
You've got to ask yourself a couple of questions. First up, how does a guy getting a lap dance get a shoe in the eye?
Hmmm.
A table dance, maybe.
Hmmm.
It must have been a pretty elaborate lap dance. Usually guys have their eyes elsewhere, other than the lady's feet.
Hmmm.
So, like, maybe the guy didn't like lap dances and was standing on his head to see if it'd help if he looked at things from a different angle.
Hmmm.
Do you think she'd bump and grind her heel into his eye?
Hmmm.
How was it he came into contact with the sole (pun intended) article of clothing this woman was probably wearing.
Hmmm.
Maybe the guy told the stripper "I've got my eye on you".
Hmmm.
Maybe she told him "I think you're gonna get a kick out of this".
Hmmm.
And when he was awarded his settlement in court did the media headline this story "The thrill of lap dancing, the agony of da feet"?
Hmmm.
All I can say is man, why didn't I think of that instead of wasting $10 a week on lottery tickets.
Comments
Just a regular Tuesday at a strip club for me.
I would think the harm would be to his thighs as she stood on his lap.
Okay. I see now. That would definitely hurt.
Bad.
I think it went something like this.
Me: What's the big deal about a lap dance? So she sits on his lap and moves her arms around.
Him: She moves more than her arms.
Me: What? She taps her toes to the music?
Him: No. (Raises his eyebrows.)
Me: She moves her hips?
Him: Yeah. And she grinds them on his lap (raises his eyebrows and tips his chin down for emphasis.)
Me: But if she did that the guy might... (light bulb goes on.)
Him: Yes. That's what a lap dance is.
Me: No way.
Him: I'm just telling you what it is.
Me: (Sits in stunned silence then cringes.)
What was your question again, noname?
I really want to see the explanation that went with the lawsuit. I bet the Smoking Gun is already on that.