Skip to main content

"Knocked Out"

She’s been called wacky and erratic, but each week millions upon millions tuned in to see what blithering vapidness she’d come up with. And she made millions upon millions of dollars as the middle judge, bookended between Simon “Reminds Me Of A Cabaret Singer” Cowell and Randy “Dog” Jackson on American Idol. Bookended until last season when the program’s producers added Kara DioGuardi to the mix. I guess that was the beginning of the end for Miss Shut Up And Dance because last week she told her fans in a Tweet on Twitter that she was leaving the show.


You know I don’t think it had anything to do with the fact that her contract talks were going nowhere. I think there were other, more substantive reasons, any one of which could have put her over the edge… Here are several reasons why Paula may have departed Idol:

Cowell wouldn’t stop playing footsie with her under the judge's table.

If Randy told her one more “touring with Journey” story she was gonna puke.

All this time she thought A. I. stood for artifical intelligence.

She was heartbroken to learn Seacrest was gay when, in Season 2, she’d told him she’d be “Forever Your Girl”
She's done paying alimony to Emilio Estevez.

Janet Jackson called. She wants her to play the lead in “Wacko Jacko: Fun Times at Neverland”

Abdul started out as a cheerleader for the Los Angeles Lakers. Members of The Jacksons saw her perform at a game and asked her to do their choreography. She worked closely with Janet Jackson before striking out on a somewhat successful singing and dancing career of her own and seven years ago landed in the judges chair on American Idol.

Paula, we’re sorry to see you go. All we can say is: "It wasn’t your best performance", Paula, but "America loves you"!

Labels:

Comments

Donnie said…
Damn! The very reason I liked to watch that show, albeit some of the talent was good, was because of Abdul's dimwitted doings on air. She was at her best when she was, well...her.
11 August 2009 at 09:29
Anonymous said…
Hee hee.

I'm beginning to wonder if it's all a conspiracy to boost AI ratings.

Let's wait and see if Powla doesn't mysteriously reconcile with the AI Powers that be at the 11th hour.

Ha!
11 August 2009 at 11:14
Anonymous said…
Straight up!
.
Sorry.
11 August 2009 at 14:43
Anonymous said…
One might say American Idol is taking one step forward and two steps back.

I, on the other hand, believe the show will be worse without her ramblings.
11 August 2009 at 18:07
nonamedufus said…
Don: Oh yeah, between her and Cowell's put-downs - that's what drew people in week after week.

Quirk: You know you may have something there. It wouldn't surprise me.

lotgk:(sigh) you're forgiven.

ftu: I actually stopped watching a couple of years ago. I grew tired of the judges having basically the same comments time after time, dawg.
11 August 2009 at 19:05
Anonymous said…
I only watch the episodes of the try outs. I love watching people make complete fools out of themselves.
11 August 2009 at 23:03
John J Savo said…
It's not just Paula. The whole show has become vapid and obnoxious.
12 August 2009 at 08:02
nonamedufus said…
TFU: Yeah it really is 2 different shows isn't it. The tryouts and the performances.

John: ...and I hear they just signed Cowell to another 3 years of vapidness and obnoxiousness!
12 August 2009 at 08:18
Anonymous said…
And his nipples for an additional four after that.
12 August 2009 at 10:28
nonamedufus said…
lotgk: ...would have been pointless otherwise.
12 August 2009 at 14:35
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born.  That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network.  And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard.  But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door.  And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran.  The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993.  I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share.  The formula was pretty simple.  A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains.  The show opened as follows... Imagination Day!  Oh boy! ...
41 comments
Read more

30 Days of Photos III #4 Sour

Check out Ziva's Inferno for the rest of today's photos.
53 comments
Read more

It's For You

I'm going to show my age here - and at my age be thankful that's all I'm going to show - but I can recall growing up as a kid in Toronto and we had one telephone in the house. It was a wall-mounted, black rotary-dial affair behind the door in our kitchen. If you stretched the cord you could actually sit down at the kitchen table while you talked on the phone. This was in the mid-50s, hardly on the heels of the device's invention, nevertheless - having been patented by Alexander Graham Bell in 1876 - it was still in it's formative years. Coloured models, the Princess phone, and the push button model were all yet to come, to say nothing of wireless home phones and the cell phone. The telephone, by the way, figured prominently in comedian Bob Newhart's early stand-up routine. In the late 50s/early 60s Newhart made his mark using a telephone as a prop and having hilarious one-sided conversations. It was a device he used for years. The telephone also played a ce...
51 comments
Read more