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59 or 64



Come closer.

I don't want to say this too loudly.

Don't tell anyone.

It's my birthday.

Yep, I'm another year older.

And so are my kidneys and bladder.

So here's a little tune to observe my internal organs' birthday.

It's based on Chicago's 25 or 6 to 4....


Hit it!

Dunh, dunh, dunh, dunh, dunh... dunh, dunh, dunh, dunh, dunh...

(Okay so you try interpreting the opening of that song!)

Can't wait for the break of day
I've gotta go now, right away
Bang against the bed my thigh
Tears swell up I start to cry
Running cross-legged across the floor
Am I 59 or 64?

Staring blindly at my knee
It's dark and I squat to pee
Wanting just to go to sleep
My pj's down in a heap
Should I try to pee some more
Am I 59 or 64?

Feeling like I ought to wake
Today's the day I'll have cake
And maybe some beers, we will see
I'll prolly just have to pee
Sit me near the bathroom door
Am I 59 or 64?

So if you haven't guessed yet I'm 59. It's my kidneys and bladder that feel like they're 64!

If you can't put my words with the tune, here's the original:

If you're wondering what the heck the original song is about here's an explanation of what the lyrics mean.

Geez, their words make less sense than mine.


Cheryl said…
I'm thinkin that 59 is the new 45. I am telling myself that as I will be there on my next B'day. As far as your bladder and such, they don't have to rationalize their age as no one could probably discern by looking at them what their actual age is. (perhaps you have a very young looking bladder) So have a happy birthday. 59 or 45 or whatever
Anonymous said…
What? I thought you were 25! Honest.


Happy Birthday to you
The best punster are you!
You're a great funny Nomie!
And you look like one too!

hee hee

Happy Birthday Mr. Noname!
nonamedufus said…
Cheryl: I like the 45 part...and the younger bladder. That would be cool.
nonamedufus said…
Quirks: As I like to say: I may have to get older but that doesn't mean I have to grow up. Thanks, Quirks.
00dozo said…
Well there's an oldie. Nice job with the lyrics!

So when is your birthday? Is it today or was it yesterday? Or is it just your organs' birthday? I'm so confused, but then I am easily confused.

At the risk of repeating myself, Happy Birthday to you (or should it be to your innards?).
nonamedufus said…
00dozo: Blogaversary was Monday. Birthday is today. In dog years I'd be...dead.
laughingmom said…
Happy Birthday Doof!
Your only as old as the girls you feel!
Linda Medrano said…
Happy Birthday Sir! All of my parts are older than yours, and I don't let it get me down. You still rock at 59. xoxoxo
Brooke Amanda said…
Happy, happy birthday! Hope you are having a great day!
Jayne Martin said…
Happy Birthday! Oh, honey -- if I had back all the time I spend peeing, I'd still be in the womb (and that's just in the last couple of years). Hate to break it to you, but it doesn't get any better. Before you know it you're one of those people hauling an outhouse behind your car.

I like your lyrics. I think they should rerecord the song using them and call it the geriatric version.

May all your birthday wishes come true, my fine funny friend.
Happy Birthday NoName! Enjoy your cake and beer (although not at the same time, I hope!). Many happy returns!
nonamedufus said…
laughingmom: Oh really? Don't tell my wife.
nonamedufus said…
Linda: Well, thank you ma'am. You rock too!
nonamedufus said…
Brooke Amanda: The power went out at our place and we spent the night in a nearby hotel. Worked for me!
nonamedufus said…
Jayne: Thanks, Jayne. I had a great day. In part due to comments like yours.
nonamedufus said…
We work: I may have had more beer than cake. In fact I didn't have any cake at all. What's up with that?
Madge said…
Happy Birthday Dufus!!! Glad I found you.
DameMeow said…
Happy Birthday! Well since you can't change your kidneys and bladder...why not redecorate the bathroom?
Ziva said…
Happy belated birthday, dufus!!
nonamedufus said…
Madge: I'm glad you found me too. And thanks for the birthday wishes.
nonamedufus said…
DameMeow: That's a damn fine idea!
nonamedufus said…
Ziva: And a belated thanks right back at ya!
Boom Boom Larew said…
Happy Belated Birthday, Dufus! Have you cleaned up that water on the knee yet? Many happy returns of the day!
nonamedufus said…
Boom Boom: Hey, another one of my long-time followers! You know I don't feel old. You might say I feel like a real whiz kid. (hahaha)

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