Skip to main content

Robbers of African-American Persuasion

For anyone who didn't see the episode of David Letterman's show where this story was told, read this: (And remember it's a true story...)
On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine.
She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. 'I'll be right back and we'll go to eat' she told her husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator.
As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard. Both were black.. One of them was very tall and had an intimidating figure. The woman froze. Her first thought was: 'These two are going to rob me.'
Her next thought was: 'Don't be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice gentlemen.' But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.
Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed.
A second passed, and then another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move. Panic consumed her. 'My God' she thought, I'm trapped and about to be robbed!
Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore.
Then one of the men said, 'Hit the floor.'
Instinct told her to do what they told her.
The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her.
'Take my money and spare me', she prayed.
More seconds passed. She heard one of the men say politely, 'Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you're going to, we'll push the button.'
The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up.
Confused, she struggled to her feet. 'When I told my friend here to hit the floor,' said the average sized one, I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hit the floor, ma'am.' He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing.
The woman thought: 'My Gosh, what a spectacle I've made of myself.'
She was too humiliated to speak. The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket.
When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor.
At her door they bid her a good evening.
As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator.
The woman brushed herself off.. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband.
The next morning flowers were delivered to her room; a dozen roses.
Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred-dollar bill.
The card said: 'Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years.
It was signed: Eddie Murphy & Michael Jordan.

merci Leaman

Comments

Dalton J. Fox said…
They seriously told this on Letterman as fact? If so, I can't believe Letterman's writers didn't do their research.

When originally told, Reggie Jackson was the black celebrity and it took place in New York. It has since been regurgitated many times over the years with the setting and the celebrity changing.

Here's a link to read about it. A few years ago, my mom even told me this story happened to someone that she knew while they were in Vegas! I had to break the news to her that this person she knows is full of shit. Strangely, in her version, the celebrity wasn't black. He was instead a large, menacing California governor named Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Anonymous said…
Oh.My.God.

Thanks for the morning laugh.

:-) That was funny!!!!

(I need my inhaler now!)

Ms. Thirty Something.

PS - yeah, the whole 'reality' thing dampers the laugh, but whoever came up with it had a great sense of humor.
nonamedufus said…
DJF: Thanks! Fascinating that this tale that's been circulating for about 30 years in one form or another...and nary a word his true! It's an urban legend, then. lol

Miss 30 Something: Yeah, it was funny!

Popular posts from this blog

Sunday Funnies

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born.  That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network.  And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard.  But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door.  And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran.  The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993.  I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share.  The formula was pretty simple.  A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains.  The show opened as follows... Imagination Day!  Oh boy!  You know what happens on Imagination D

SuperBowl Ads

Well, the game didn't go my way, but some of the American Super Bowl Ads (found at: http://www.myspace.com/superbowlads ) turned my crank... Diet Pepsi Max Super Bowl Ad: Wake Up People Ginseng & Caffeine Bud Light Wine & Cheese Party Super Bowl Commercial Bridgestone Tire Super Bowl Commercial: Squirrel vs Car Garmin Nuvi Super Bowl Commercial: Napolean Finds His Way w/ GPS Bud Light Super Bowl Ad: Immigrants with Carlos Mencia Planters Nuts Super Bowl Commercial: Woman Attracts Men w/ Nuts Pepsi Stuff Super Bowl Commercial: Justin Timberlake Bud Light Super Bowl Commercial: Cave Man Invents Wheel Coca Cola Super BOwl Commercial: Parade Balloon Victoria's Secret Super Bowl Commercial with Adriana Lima Book: Clapton - The Autobiography by Eric Clapton Music: New Seasons by The Sadies