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The 308, 592, 275th Most Interesting Man In The World

Have you seen my hero on TV? He usually shows up in commercials during sporting events. There's something Hemingway-esque about him. Guys around the world look up to him and want to be just like him. You know who I'm talking about? The most interesting man in the world...that's who:

Now that's one helluva guy. I want to be just like him. He's admired world-wide. Looked up to. He has rugged good looks. And he gets all the chicks.

Now I've been working on displacing this guy as the most interesting man in the world. I've been at this for a while. Working really hard. Here's how I've managed to become the 308, 592, 275th most interesting man in the world:

cue voice-over:

He's never one to brag about the close calls he's had.
He let's the skid marks on his shorts do the talking.

He's not a couch potato...he's an intellectual expert in television programming.

He always wears two pairs of pants when he golfs because he often gets a hole in one.

He drinks his beer out of the bottle because glasses are for little boys, babies and nerds.

He doesn't take pictures of his junk and post it on the internet.
Why would he when a statue of him is on display in Florence, Italy.

He's the 308, 592, 275th most interesting man in the world.

I always drink beer, and when I do it's never *spits* Dos Equis.

It's Thursday my friends.


Nicky said…
Really? 308, 592, 275th? Don't worry NoName, you'll always be 294,737,564th to me. Always. :-)
nonamedufus said…
Hey, cool. Only 294, 737, 563 to go!
quirkyloon said…
Oh my heck. That baby with the 'stache? Spooky. Gave me big time heebee jeebies. *shudders* And I'm with Nicky, you'll always be 294,737,564th in my book too!

hee hee
I'm right there with you...well in 308,592,276...if I'm lucky.
nonamedufus said…
Damn I came so far so fast and I've already stalled.
nonamedufus said…
We may have to have an "Interesting Man Off" to determine a winner. Things don't look good for me. There are days I can't even keep myself awake.
Linda Medrano said…
Dufus, you are more interesting that that Mexican beer guy. Far more interesting!
nonamedufus said…
Aw, thanks, Linda. It was the skid marks on the shorts, wasn't it?
Linda Medrano said…
Actually, no, it wasn't.
Linda Medrano said…
Dang! I thought you said "fast" rather than "far" and I thought,"Oh dear! That's not good!"
nonamedufus said…
I wouldn't know.
redheadranting said…
Dufus, sometimes I forget how funny you are. Thanks for reminding me with this most excellent post.

Tide works wonders on skid marks.
nonamedufus said…
But then I wouldn't be nearly as interesting.

You forget how funny I am?
00dozo said…
You just had to play the skid marks card. Ew!

But I do like the, "... intellectual expert in television programming."

Heh, heh.

redheadranting said…
I know how punny you are.

I know that doesn't sound right, I just haven't been in the mood for funny lately, and I haven't been visiting any blogs so ... did I back pedal enough?
nonamedufus said…
Oh, I'm highly intellectual.
nonamedufus said…
That answer works just fine. I don't think you're giving me the gears. (back pedal...gears) Lucky for me you're getting out more.
Shawn said…
Beer campaigns often make the best commercials. Too bad Dos Equis is a lousy beer.
nonamedufus said…
Lousy beer? Can't be. Why would the most interesting man in the world drink it?
Anonymous said…
Why American men should boycott American women

I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?

American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.

This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.

Oh yours is SO MUCH BETTER!!!
nonamedufus said…
Thanks. I'm trying for the "everyman" most interesting man.
Shawn said…
You're right. I stand corrected. But is it okay if I don't drink it ever again?

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