I know, I know, I know I should have reported in before now. But sometimes real life just gets in the way. I attempted 5 books in November. I say attempted because I slapped a big DNF (did not finish) on Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon. I just can't seem to get into this guy. It's the second or third of his I've given up on, Not so the other four, starting with a biography of Stephen Stills called Change Partners. This followed by a hilarious biography of the guy responsible for National Lampoon called A Stupid and Futile Gesture - How Doug Kenney and National Lampoon Changed Comedy Forever. I ended the month reading yet another biography, this one of the man behind Rolling Stone magazine,. It was called Sticky Fingers: The Life and Times of Jann Wenner and Rolling Stone Magazine. A fascinating read. So last month I hit the magic number 50 I'd imagined for myself back in January. If I roll this month into my yearly total I'm at 54 books. And I still hav...
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Well, folks, I read seven (count 'em) seven books in October. One I didn't finish but even at that I hit the magic number 50 I estimated for myself by the end of the year. The six books I successfully waded through were, firstly, What Happened, Hillary Clinton's book on her bid for the Presidency. I''m a bit of a political junkie so I get off on this stuff but still it kinda struck me as one long whine over losing. Next up was the excellent Canyon of Dreams: The Magic and Music of Laurel Canyon. Laurel Canyon was the fabled area outside of Los Angeles where many musicians and artists lived. Known as a 60s enclave, the book takes a look at just who lived there over the last 80 years. A fascinating read. Next up was Lightfoot, a biography of Canadian folk singer Gordon Lightfoot. He may have been responsible for some iconic folk songs but he was also quite the womanizer and boozer. Enough said. Then I read Dan Brown's new tome Origin, the fifth ...
The weather was unseasonably warm for October. The sun set around 6:30 but the daylight hours were quite enjoyable. So thought Richard, as he set out for his daily walk in the woods. He marvelled at the turning leaves which exhibited an explosion of colour more significant with each passing day. But Richard knew the turning leaves would soon start to fall. And the trees would soon be bare with no leaves at all. And then the snow would fly and fall from the trees as the leaves had before it. Richard couldn't help but think of the sudden change to come as a seizure of sorts. And he wasn't looking forward to it. After all, who would welcome a seizure, he thought, as he rolled uncontrollably among the leaves. This week paroxysm/seizure was the prompt at Two Word Tuesday .
The old man down the street was terrible to the children. When the kids frisbee landed on his front lawn he ran out and grabbed it, yelling at them to keep off his grass. When the boys baseball landed in his driveway he did the same. Neighbours began to wonder when he'd hold a yard sale to give back his confiscated items. The area children avoided his house at Halloween. He didn't display a carved pumpkin and he didn't pass out candy. At Christmas his house remained dark with no seasonal lights or decorations. Neighbours wondered what was wrong with this guy. They'd never seen anyone so ornery. And then one day something happened. A child new to the neighbourhood rang the old man's doorbell and asked if he'd sponsor her in the upcoming walk for charity. He said sure, sponsored her for $10 a kilometre and signed the pledge form as... Mister Tetchy. The Two Word Tuesday prompt was tetchy/ornery this week. Now get outta my face.
Ronald was a lucky lad. When he was four his parents perished in a hot air balloon incident at the Hattiesburg fair. Now wait, that's not the lucky part. Ronald survived the balloon blast because he was on the ground with his Aunt Flo and Uncle Joe Bob. Flo and Joe Bob had no children of their own and so took it upon themselves to raise Ronald as their own. Ronald may have been an only child but he certainly didn't suffer from a lack of love and affection. Flo and Joe Bob showered Ronald with love and he felt warm and protected throughout his time with them, Yes, that's right, he only spent a certain amount of time with them. Then they too were gone and Ronald was alone. It happened in the summer of 1976. Flo and Joe Bob planned a camping vacation in Canada's Algonquin Park, miles from Hattiesburg. They packed up the Subaru on a Monday morning and headed north. Ronald, in the back seat, could barely contain himself. When they arrived, the campers decided to unp...
The five books I read in September raised my yearly count to 44 books - 6 away from my anticipated 50 books by the end of the year. I'm sure I'll make it. I started the month out with a new thriller from Michael Connelly called The Late show. It's about a women cop who works the night shift. This is a new character for Connelly who is better known for his Harry Bosch series. Nevertheless this was an enthralling page-turner. I then picked up Mississippi Blood by Greg Iles. This is the third and final book in the Natchez Burning trilogy. Somewhere along the line I missed one of these but was nevertheless able to follow the overall gripping story about race relations in the south. I then moved on to the Rules of Civility by Amor Towles a coming-of-age tale about a mid-twenties woman in New York in the late 1930s. Having enjoyed his second book A Gentleman in Moscow I felt I had to go back to his first novel. I wasn't disappointed. For a change of p...
Susie had special powers. Or at least she worked at developing them. If she concentrated really hard she could see into the future. This talent was a little off-setting to her friends. But she was determined to perfect this skill. To that end she attended psychic school. It was kind of like high school but without the ladder. Susie never missed a class. Well that's because looking ahead she knew when they occurred on her schedule. Miss Clair Voyent was a good teacher. Always held students' attention. So much so you'd want to run out and buy a lottery ticket. And each class began the same with Miss Clair Voyent calling attention. Sometimes the students would jokingly respond to Miss Voyent's roll call with the response of 'prescient". Get it? Prescient in Psychic class? Yeah. Our prompt for Two Word Tuesday was prescient/psychic this week. Looking ahead to next week I wish I could determine the prompt, but I can't. This week was enough.
I'm slipping. Only four books this month. I've adopted a slower pace in August, at times going several days without reading. Nevertheless those four books bring my year-to-date total to 39 books. I'm sure I can read 11 books over the next four months to reach my projected yearly total of 50. So, August. I read two David Baldacci thrillers. Absolute Power about an immoral President. And Total Control about the ability of computers as well as the U.S's finances. Both, early works by Baldacci, were excellent, I read Burning Bright by Nick Petrie. At the beginning main character Peter Ash reads like a poor man's Jack Reacher. A loner, former military type who wanders here and there taking on difficult cases. But it was a great page-turner. Finally, on the recommendation of Peter at the cottage I read A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles. It's about a Russian aristocrat sentenced to life, not in prison, but to the attic of a fancy hotel. The concept here as...
Bob and Henry were archeologists and were on the verge of the discovery of their lives. On the uninhabited island of StickMyFinger Innit they were about to become the first explorers of a giant cave. Who knew what dangers lurked below. Certainly not Bob and Henry. The two archeologists prepared to descend into the earth's core. They loaded their backs with their equipment and set off. Almost immediately they were overcome by a powerful smell. It was as if some giant animal had crawled into the cave and died. And the deeper they went the worse the stench became. Finally Bob turned to Henry and gasped "I don't know if I can go on Henry. That stench is nearly making me unconscious." "Stench?" said Henry. "I thought it was my asthma!" The Two Word Tuesday prompt this week was miasma/stench .
No need to be concerned Like they say It's only a number And while it may sound trite It's true You just get better every day I am constantly amazed How such a beautiful, intelligent and poised woman Can at times be such a little girl In those time you are so full of wonder, awe and merriment Be it bunnies in the backyard Or a family of your duckling friends in the lake at the cottage It's part of your allure The depth of caring for all things But wait, there's more Your sense of humour knocks me out And you are never more beautiful Than when you laugh uncontrollably...usually at your own jokes! On the serious side I have observed the tenderness and care you display In family relationships You are an amazing daughter to your mother A loving mother to your son And a caring aunt to your nephew Not to mention a devoted wife Who puts up with my shit And every day demonstrates her deep love for me You have changed me For the better ...
Last week I told you a little story about Convivial, a little girl who made a lot of friends. What I didn't tell you was that she had a little brother named Dack. He had a last name that he didn't like to use: Dick. Dack Dick didn't make many friends. In fact the little boys and girls sniggered at him and his name. That's an interesting word: sniggered. There are many synonyms but I think my favourite is belittle. It really conveys a sense of ridicule which is what the little boys and girls were doing. They were ridiculing poor Dack. Now Dack wasn't the sharpest knife in the cutlery drawer. Another reason the boys and girls would ridicule him. At school he was an average student, pulling down Bs and the odd C. He was content. His parents were content and his sister Convivial was content. One day in English class the teacher hosted a little game of "What's That Mean?". She'd mention a word and the class would have to guess another word that...
When she was born she was such a little bundle of joy that her mother called her Convivial. And the name stuck. And as she grew older Convivial easily made and amassed friends. In fact, birthday parties became almost unmanageable. It was a good thing she was born in August because her birthday celebrations were moved from the backyard to a nearby park just to contain all the guests. School was another matter entirely. There wasn't a lunch table big enough in the cafeteria to contain all her little buddies. And the school bus? They had to lay on several so that her friends could follow her and ensure she got home safely. You have never before seen such a sociable child. People would stop her in the street and say to her "My, oh my, you're convivial." To which she'd reply "Why yes I am.' And, thought these people, arrogant as well. This week's Two Word Tuesday prompt its convivial/sociable . Sometimes it doesn't pay to be too convivial. ...
Five books this month. Not bad considering I spent the month lazing at the cottage. It brings my yearly total to 35 books. I began the month with Money For Nothing, an interesting history of the music video industry by Saul Austerlitz who takes things back to the Beatles. It must have been a Beatles month because the next book was a history of the influence of black Americans on popular music called How The Beatles Destroyed Rock and Roll. Elijah Wald's premise is the music was never more popular than when it was performed by white artists. The next book was Dreaming the Beatles by Rolling Stone columnist Robert Sheffield. In a humorous series of essays Sheffield explains why the Beatles are still important to music and culture nearly 50 years after they broke up. I really enjoyed this one. Now don't laugh but get the title of the next book I read. Gimme A Show! 50 Years on th Rock and Rollercoaster: An Unauthorized Biography of James Pankow, Trombonist wit...
It was getting worse. The store-bought milk was piling up in the oven. And the fridge was full of toothpaste and shampoo. Bob and Betty had lived a long and loving life together. They'd been married for 63 years and then last year Betty died. Breast cancer. But she went quickly and for that Bob was grateful. But since Betty's death Bob turned into a different person. He was alone now. Had no one for companionship or to help with the little things and provide for him. He cooked his own meals. When he remembered to do so. He had become very forgetful since Betty's death. He'd stopped shaving for example. The children remarked upon it. But of course they had busy lives of their own and didn't have much time to look after their addled father. Think of that song The Cat's In the Cradle" and you'll kind of get the idea. And so Bob spent most of his days in a daze, if you'll pardon the pun. And for some reason there was no toothpaste or shampo...
Little Tommy led a charmed life. An only child he had it made. Pretty much anything he wanted, he got. He loved his parents and was thankful for all they did for him. So thankful, in fact, that Tommy and his parents went to church every Sunday to thank God for all the good things in their lives. Little Tommy's favourite part of the service was when they sang hymns. Tommy was a good singer for someone so young and he wailed and wailed, his face raised to the ceiling and heaven above. Tommy knew his parents were very religious because when they got home from church every Sunday they would retreat to the bedroom to pray. Tommy knew this because every once and awhile he'd hear his mother exclaim "Oh God, oh God, Oh God." Left to his own devices, little Tommy would fix himself some breakfast and reflect on his pitch perfect wailing. In fact, he often continued to sing the hymns he had just sung in church. His favourite breakfast was a new cereal called Pocs. It ...
Week two of the "great strength of our marriage contest" whereby I spend each week at the cottage Maryse and I have rented while Maryse spends Monday to Thursday in the city working. Don't tell her I said this but I'm lonely. I miss her. And I'm left to my own devices. No not the inflatable doll. I mean I have to do things for myself like wake myself up in the morning, prepare my own meals and so on. This morning I was up at 5:30. I prepared breakfast, ate it, did the dishes, had my shower, got dressed and drove the garbage down the road to the dump. All before 9am. And all without having somebody tell me to do it. Pretty amazing, eh? There's no cell service here and no network television. I make do with Netflix and You Tube. Catching up on some classic movies. I watched Quentin Tarantino's Pulp Fiction the other night and Spike Jonze's Adaptation with Nicholas Cage the next night. I should have said classic 90s movies. My meals are pretty ped...
We gathered in the dark. After an evening of several libations with new friends we boarded the pontoon boat for a short trip across the lake. The only sound, apart from our conversation and laughter, and the low speed chugging of the motor, was the call of several loons. It was our first day at the cottage and the rain had finally let up after falling for most of the day. We were lucky. The fireworks began at 10pm sharp. Mayhem would have ensued if the pyrotechnics had have been cancelled. I'd never witnessed fireworks on the water before. They exploded noisily in the air but their reflection below was silent. For twenty minutes the loons had company as the revellers cheered and clapped and the pontoon drivers sounded their horns. We laughed at the solar-powered boat whose horn bleated like a sheep. The manly toots of the rest of the boats responded to its call. Or perhaps derided it. The loons were silent. This week's prompt from Tara at Two Word Tuesday is fire...
Six books in June raised my yearly total to 30 as I hit the mid-point of the year. I'd say I'm well on track to hit the 50 I estimated for myself for 2017. As ever my reads were an eclectic bunch beginning with a change of pace called The Road to Jonestown about the charismatic Jim Jones and his followers known as the Peoples Temple. This book by Jeff Guinn was somewhat of a disturbing read. Interestingly the man responsible for the event that gave rise to the phrase "don't drink the kool-aid" didn't even use kool-aid as part of his poisonous mixture but some other fruit drink. Who knew? My next two books were written by two of my favourite writers Jo Nesbo and Dennis Lehane. Nesbo's 11th instalment in his Harry Hole series The Thirst and Lehane's Since We Fell were both suspenseful reads. A friend of mine loaned me 8 or 9 books in June and I started reading actual books as opposed to Kindle books on my iPad. So, having had my fi...
Bob and Brenda worked in the supermarket. They weren't check-out clerks. And they weren't stock-boys. Brenda sure wasn't. And they weren't employees who worked in the fish section or the deli. No. They were on the shelves. They hadn't been on the shelves very long but in that short time they'd developed a considerably close friendship. The chatted all day when the store was busy and at night when the store was closed. They talked about everything. The talked about what raw products they came from. The talked about their manufacturing processes. And they talked about the long routes in semi-trailers that brought them to this store. Oddly enough the one thing they never made clear to one another was just what product each of them was. One day when Brenda was commenting on their friendship she told Bob she was grateful for their amity. "Are you Tea?" said Bob, pekoe-ing her way. "I thought I was Tea". You're coffee!" This w...
I don't know if you saw this or not but NASA intends to send a spacecraft straight into the sun next year. And President Trump wants to be on board. POTUS considers himself an expert on space which should come as no surprise considering the amount to be found between his ears. Scientists, affected by the Trump cutbacks, are debating whether or not to stroke his ego and tell him he'll be hot stuff, literally. Here in Canada the CSA, or Canadian Space Agency (What? we have one), is preparing for a mission of their own. They intend to send Prime Minister Trudeau to the fourth planet from the sun, Mars. As you know speculation abounds as to the possibility of life on Mars. Just ask David Bowie. Oh, too late. Nevertheless Canadian scientists, who still hold their jobs in Canada, are interested in finding a new source of selfies for our PM. The CSA originally had its sights, and telescopes, set on the ringed planet, but then changed their minds when they learned the average t...
In May I read four books. My yearly total now stands at 23. The Ottawa Senators two playoff series, first with the Rangers and then with the Penguins ate into my reading time as did binge watchIng six seasons of VEEP, one of the funniest series I've ever seen. I started out the month with two Rex Stout mysteries, Over My Dead Body followed by Where There's a Will, numbers seven and eight in the Nero Wolfe canon. Satisfying reads as always. Then I moved on to Letterman: The Last Giant of Late Night by Jason Zinoman. This was an interesting look at Letterman. I never knew the fella had, according to Zinoman, so many insecurities. I always preferred Letterman over Leno so I enjoyed this account and went all the way with five stars. I concluded the month with Neil Gaiman's American Gods. I saw the video version was running on Netflix but wanted to read the book before I watched it. I read the 10th anniversary version of the book on Kindle complete with audio excerpt...
Did you ever use the wrong word, thinking it meant something else. Come on now I'm sure I'm not the only one this has happened to. But I'm damn good at Scrabble. And I don't even have to check the dictionary. When challenged I just speak confidently in a loud voice "Yeah, that's a word, it means..." It's what I do when playing with my wife, especially, who is Francophone and deigns to play in both official languages. See what I just did there? I misused "deigns". I should have said "who forces me to let her create French AND English words". Now just how do I, an Anglophone, challenge those French words. Well I just have to say I love her and I trust her. She wouldn't cheat. Not like me. One of the words I've misused up until now is temerity. I used it when I thought someone was timid. I thought temerity meant something like frightened. Who knew? Turns out it means bold or impertinent. A synonym is cheek. No, trust ...
Your esteemed political observer knows why President Pen Pal (all those Executive Orders) has been acting so irrationally. Stick with me here. He wants to rewrite NAFTA with Canada. He almost came so far as to get rid of the deal altogether. He fired the head of the FBI. Many people think , the cynical among you, that it was because Big Jim was getting too close to the relationship between Russia and the Trump administration. That wasn’t it at all. Hold your breath. *coughs wildly* Sorry, that’s some good stuff. What I was inhaling, yeah. You see Canada is set to legalize marijuana. We have companies cultivating the plants right now. And there are pot shops already operating in every major city. And some not so major. Canadians hold Prime Minister Trudeau, who promised the legislation as part of his party’selection platform, in extremely high esteem. They don’t call his party Libera for nothing. Now think about it. How else to explain Donald’s steadfast desire ...
Betsy and Bob Dinger were always the object of snide remarks because they had a lot of children. An even twelve - six boys and six girls. Their neighbours said they must have been strong believers in equality and fervent practicing Catholics. Others said they could run two hockey or basketball teams. Or one soccer or baseball team. And as the children grew that's exactly what Betsy and Bob Dinger did. Although they favoured fielding a baseball team as several of their children were great hitters and were capable of knocking a few family namesakes out of the park - that is to say dingers. Then one day the unexpected happened. Although after twelve children I guess it shouldn't be unexpected. Betsy was pregnant with child number thirteen. Dave Dinger, Doug Dinger, Donald Dinger, Dick Dinger, Ducky Dinger, Duane Dinger and their sisters Diane Dinger, Dahlia Dinger, Dakota Dinger, Daisy Dinger, Debbie Dinger and Donna Dinger were going to have a brother or sister. As su...
I managed to read five books last month raising my year-to-date total to 19 books, pretty much on track towards my estimated 50 books this year. I started out with a Tom Wolfe novel originally released in the late 90s, A Man In Full . I think this was referenced in something I read in March and I decided to try it out. Taking place in 1990s Atlanta it was an interesting read about business, real estate development and inter-racial relations. I enjoyed it and rated it 4 stars. Next up was number 21 in the Harry Bosch series by Michael Connelly, The Wrong Side of Goodbye . In it Harry is charged with hunting down an heir to a an elderly multi-millionaire on his private eye ticket while investigating a series of home invasion rapes for the San Fernando Police Department. A busy man? Yes, but of course he solves both cases with a little help from his half-brother the Lincoln Lawyer. A good read and another 4 stars. The third book I read this month was Emily Schultz's new nove...
You might say Samantha was the poster child for empty-nest syndrome. She and her husband Darren had raised three lovely children all of whom had left home over the last several years. Darren still worked so Samantha was left alone in the house all day a prisoner really of her own imagination. She tried to keep active. Since there were just the two of them there wasn't much need for housework. She kept things tidy but it didn't require much effort or time. So she filled her days with volunteering and yoga several times a week. And she was always home in time to prepare a nice dinner for Darren. One day, as she was surfing the net between yoga classes and work at the animal shelter she came across an ad for a pastime she thought might be interesting. Cooking classes. All that was required on her part, oddly enough, was a dark cloak and a pointy hat. That didn't seem like much for all the friendship and learning that was promised in the ad. Although she was sort of m...
She tsk tsked when she emptied the dishwasher. Turns out he hadn't loaded it properly. Not only that but last time he emptied it he apparently emptied it the wrong way. Now how could there be a wrong way to empty the dishwasher you might ask. Well, I'll tell you. When he loaded it he placed the knives in the back right hand corner of the cutlery rack. He placed the forks at the left front and the spoons in the empty spaces in between. Wrong she said. The knives go at the front left. The forks at the back left and the spoons on the right. Now if that wasn't enough to magnify his faults in loading the dishwasher, she barred him from loading it in the future in addition to emptying it. Turns out he unloaded the cutlery first, then the middle drawer with glasses and finally the bottom drawer with plates and bowls which for her was wrong. She redoubled her criticism barring him from unloading the dishwasher. The proper way she said was the bottom drawer of plates first, t...