Women. Sometimes you can't live with them. And sometimes you can't live with them. Don't get me wrong. I love my wife. Madly. And I simply can't live without her. But if I were to believe everything I read I'd think women are...how shall I put this? Flighty?
Two articles I came across last week gave me pause. And good thing for me that anything that gives me pause usually ends up in a post on my blog.
And men, consider this a public service. Oh, yes, I'm more than happy to share with you helpful hints I've found to make your lives easier...no, no, no strike that...make your relationships more rewarding.
The first article was headlined "Women think blokes who are 'too nice' are cheating". Now c'mon. Get real. But no. A study found that two thirds of women surveyed became suspicious if their partner made grand romantic gestures. What kind of gestures? Well, here are the top 20:
1. Buys jewellery
2. New moves in the bedroom
3. More emotional
4. Buys flowers
5. Buys chocolates
6. More attentive
7. Buys sexy underwear
8. Book a romantic weekend away
9. Buys you more things
10. Helps more with the chores
11. Tells you he loves you more
12. Makes breakfast in bed
13. Pays more compliments
14. Texts more
15. Does the cooking
16. Calls more
17. Listens better
18. Runs baths
19. Hand over the TV remote
20. Cuddles more
Don't worry, honey. I've been warned. As much as I'd dearly love it, you'll never catch me doing any of these things. I know I used to. And I actually did more than one a day sometimes. But I shouldn't anymore for fear of giving you the wrong idea. I'm sure you understand. Far be it from me to give you the impression I've been cheating. I'll just keep on watching TV in my underwear while cracking open a couple of cold ones you've brought me. What's for supper?
But wait. There was another article I came across that made me pause. Yeah. This one involved a covert study of parking lots across Britain. Yeah, that's right. "Covert". Using hidden cameras, researchers determined that women were far better at parking than their male counterparts. Well that makes sense. They should be good at parking because most of them certainly don't now how to drive!
Woah, woah, woah. That's not my opinion. No, I saw it on the internet.
You can bet none of these women will be on the receiving end of jewelry, chocolates, flowers or new moves in the bedroom from their husbands.