In the doldrums of summer there’s nothing better to keep an idle American interested in American Idol (see what I just did there?) than to leak stories about the coming season’s panel of judges. After the Ellen experiment exploded (oooh, nice alliteration) in the executive producers’ faces things looked about as bleak as Kara DioGuardi’s next paycheck. (Who?)
But now, Idolettes, word comes of a truly unique pairing of pop music people to join Randy Jackson (who?) on the judges’ dais.
The first is Aerosmith lead singer Steven “Living On The Edge” Tyler who himself let it slip he’d been pegged to replace Simon Cowell.
Um, these ears are gettin’ old. Can you crank it down a notch?
Next up is Jennifer “I was Ben Afleck’s main squeeze but then I married Marc Anthony” Lopez. Nice pair. Hey! I mean the pair of J.Lo and Tyler.
Woah! Is that thing for real?
If J.Lo and Tyler are the best they can come up with, then what are the producers thinking? And they haven’t even gotten the three judges together to see if they click. Can’t you just imagine how that meeting will go?
Randy: Hey Dawg, wassup?
Steven: J.Lo’s got a gun..
J.Lo: I’m not gunnin’ for ya, Steve. I’m just “Feelin’ So Good”
Randy: Was it much of a “Journey” for you guys to get here?
Steven: Not at all. I was in the neighbourhood so all I had to do was “Walk This Way”
J.Lo: Hey guys, “Let’s Get Loud”
Steven: Yeah, if we’re to make this work we’ll have to show some “Sweet Emotion”
Randy: Wow, Dawg.
J.Lo: I think you’re right Steve. I think we’re getting along now and I just knew we would. Actually I’ve just been “Waiting For Tonight”
Steven: Oh, me too. And I “Don’t Want To Miss A Thing”
Randy: Damn, Dawg, you and the lady are so fine. I’m happy to be in your posse.
Steven: “Dream On”
J.Lo: C’mon guys we need to get along. We need to show some admiration for one another. After all “Love Don’t Cost A Thing”
Randy: That’s right, Dawg. Hey, look there’s Ryan Seacrest. Have you guys met him yet?
Steven: “Dude Looks Like A Lady”
Fat? Yeah, I was fat. I had man-boobs out to here, Dawg.
Comments
I admit I have a crush on Steven Tyler. I know he's weird looking, but dang he is all that and a bag of chips!
rrrrRRRRrrrr.
And I said whoa as I read whoa on that J-lo pic!
Tell me that was photo-shopped!
But (pun intended) they look like they make a great pillow! hee hee
Good to be back...and out and about visiting my pals in cyberspace. You guys are hilarious!
Congratulations, NoName!
Hard to believe that J-Lo's ass is that large and pokey-outey. She'd have trouble sitting down, I think.
I tell you if there was a midget in the room, she'd poke his eye out!
I don't know where her career is at these days but it seems her best assets are behind her.
The Murugan Theatre. It is one of the theatres in Thiruthangal, a small town near the famous industrial town of Sivakasi in Tamil Nadu. The small town had three theatres in those days (1980s). Chinnaknai Theatre was in the northern corner of the town and Balaji Talkies was at the other end, in the southern corner
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I don't know where her career is at these days but it seems her best assets are behind her.
I tell you if there was a midget in the room, she'd poke his eye out!