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What a Bunch of Bums

I spent the weekend watching bums. Well, actually, I watched a lot of sports but by default I saw a lot of bums.

First it was the ladies tennis at Wimbledon. Serena Williams was playing somebody Saturday but after several hours of viewing Ms. Williams rear end I couldn't tell you who it was. I think Serena - and her purple underwear - won, though.

Then came the Tour de France. Those guys really work their asses off. (See what I did there?) And I watched them do it both Saturday and Sunday. But here's the thing about cycling. Those guys have a little added padding in their pants. No they don't shove a sock down their underwear. I'm talking about the other end. The camera kept focussing on cyclists posteriors and I noticed what I thought was some additional fabric where they, you know, sit. Sure enough, after googling for it here's what I found...

Looks pretty odd. But it must be a lot more comfortable then your bare butt, and other manly parts, on a cycle seat. Who knew these guys had such an added - or, I guess, padded - advantage. They be pedallin' and gellin'.

I closed out my sports spectacular weekend watching a couple hours of golf Sunday afternoon. Guess what? More bums!

If you ever watch golf, did you ever notice how the camera lingers as guys bend over to pick their ball out of the cup? It's true. So you better be wearing the proper pants.

Troy Kelly wasn't. Nope, he was wearing this pair of white pants that modesty prevents me from sharing pictorially with you but that when he bent to retrieve his ball you could see his blue shirt shining through the backside of his pants. Now I've seen this before with other golfers, Phil Mickelson in particular, so you think Mr. Kelly would know better.

Like, you'd think other golfers would say something before he starts his round. Or, for heaven's sake, where's his wife in all this. This is one time a woman should be listened to when she says "Are you really going to wear that?" You know that saying "Don't wear white after Labour Day" I think for golfers they should amend it to say "Don't wear white EVER!"

Of course there's always the other end of the spectrum. You'll never see John Daly's shirt through his pants, although I'm not sure you could tell for sure. And you might go blind...


babs (beetle) said…
I watched Serena Williams too. I'm glad she beat the one who squawked like a parrot on every swipe at the ball!
nonamedufus said…
Yeah, that was very distracting. I noticed though in the men's finals your boy Murray had a similar affectation. I felt so bad for Murray. He made quite an effort.
babs (beetle) said…
I didn't see that one. Just caught the women's match by chance. I haven't watched tennis avidly since the Billy Jean King and Evonne Goolagong days!
P.J. said…
Don't they all squawk? I didn't watch the finals, but the Williams' sisters always seem to grunt. Sharapova is the worst though!

As for John Daly -- those pants rock. All golfers should wear wacky stuff. Would make it better to watch!
nonamedufus said…
Oh, man, Murray had the weight of the nation on his shoulders. If he had won he would have been he first Great Briton in many decades to hold the Wimbledon title. Not too much pressure, eh?
nonamedufus said…
Oh, Sharapova is the worst. I get a little uncomfortable watching women's tennis these days. With all their grunting and groaning I feel like a voyeur.
babs (beetle) said…
That is some pressure!
nonamedufus said…
Poor guy. Your nation is in mourning.
00dozo said…
I recall hearing or reading somewhere that a ref was penalizing tennis players for over-grunting. Really! (And, yes, I'm too lazy to look it up right now.)

But that butt padding? I could really use that, bike or no bike. ;-)
nonamedufus said…
TMI 00dozo.

I don't know who got disqualified but did you know they're going to introduce grunt-o-meters?
Quirky Loon said…
Goolagong! I forgot about her!

And love saying the name.

And regarding the Tour de France, I think all bike races should be done on recumbents. heh heh Or is it recumbants? Whatevs.

They're are vajayjay friendly!

*bum, bum, bum!*
nonamedufus said…
Goolagong, bang a gong, get it on.

Butt, the Tour de France is guys, Quirks. Were you thinking of entering?
Nicky said…
"... bend over to pick their ball out of the cup?"
So many jokes...
nonamedufus said…
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm a huge athletic supporter.
Quirky Loon said…
Heavens no! But it's naughty bits friendly too! hee hee
nonamedufus said…
You know if you wore one of this things in your pants on a recumbent bicycle I'm not sure you could tell if you were coming or going.
Barb said…
Holy cannoli! Those pants were wilD!
nonamedufus said…
Believe it or not he has a whole line of them that he sells.

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