Thoughts on Wives . . .(not mine, of course!)

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
(Sacha Guitry)
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
(Hemant Joshi)
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
(Socrates)
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
(Dumas)
The great question… which I have not been able to answer… is, “What does a woman want? (Sigmund Freud)
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
(Anonymous)
“Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.”
(Henny Youngman)
“I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.”
(Sam Kinison)
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.”
(James Holt McGavran)
“I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn’t.”
(Patrick Murray)
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming1. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it,2. Whenever you’re right, shut up.
(Nash)
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once…
(Anonymous)
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
(Henny Youngman)
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
(Rodney Dangerfield)
A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.
(Milton Berle)
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
(Anonymous)
A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Wife wanted.” Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
(Anonymous)
First Guy (proudly): “My wife’s an angel!”
Second Guy: “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”

The international sign for marriage:

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30 Days of Photos III #4 Sour

Check out Ziva's Inferno for the rest of today's photos.

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born. That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network. And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard. But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door. And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran. The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993. I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share. The formula was pretty simple. A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains. The show opened as follows... Imagination Day! Oh boy! ...

I Am Charlie, I'm A Bore

Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Mel Gibson, Tom Cruise, Colin Farrel...you know the list, it goes on and on. The list of Hollywood hick-ups who not content to meltdown behind closed doors have to drag each and every detail out into the light of day and share it with all of us. Well, add Charlie Sheen to that luckless and lascivious list of losers. In the past few days he's been on every major media soapbox complaining abut how he's been treated and how he's misunderstood. Last night he spent an hour on ABC's 20/20 "in his own words". Charlie, you should have stuck to the script. "I have a highly evolved brain". You know I never did like that song by Helen Reddy in the 70s "I Am Woman". But I have to say the melody really leant itself well to a parody of Hollywood's latest flame-out, Charlie Sheen. Although I never thought I'd hear myself say this, my sincerest apologies to Helen Reddy. And now if you're ready (a little play on wor...

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