Tuesday, 31 May 2016

Out of This World


Captains Smug and Vainglorious sat comfortably in the pilot seats of their Martian spacecraft. A successful lift off had propelled them thousands of light years close to earth.  As they neared the great planet Smug declared smugly "Time to take the ship off auto-pilot" to which Vainglorious replied somewhat vaingloriously "I thought you'd never do that." They each regarded the other with arched eyebrows which both had come to accept as code for 'nuff said'.

As the exit door opened they both strode toward the gangplank but found they could not disembark side by side. Smug and Vainglorious had not run into this problem with other space captains such as Captain Humble, Captain Unsure or Captain Modest. Although shifts with Captain Pompous and Captain Stuck Up had proven challenging. So arching their eyebrows at one another they decided to dismount the ship sideways, face-to-face.

It's not that Smug and Vainglorious didn't like each other it's just that each thought he was better than the other. And with the upcoming competition for an Admiral's position Smug and Vainglorious were both sure they had the edge over the other candidates, Captain Hotshot and Captain Holier-Than-Thou.

As they stood there contemplating this an earthling by the name of John spied them and waved to them. Smug and Vainglorious looked at one another wondering what to do as a wave from an earthling was certainly beneath them. John, not to be deterred and seeing as he was a bit of a snob lowered his arm as if his wave had never occurred.

"Pardon me", said Smug "Could you tell us what time it is?"

"Time?" replied John. "I don't wear a watch."

"Well then how do you tell time?" inquired Vainglorious.

"I tell time by when I receive my CDs in the mail from Amazon.ca."

"A bit of a music lover are we?" asked Vainglorious smugly as he new the answer which was so obvious.

"Yes, I am" replied John with a self-satisfied grin. "And right now it's forty-five minutes past Bob Dylan and quarter to Eric Clapton.

Smug and Vainglorious looked at John with eyebrows arched.


The prompts were smug and vainglorious from Studio30+ this week. "Surprised?" he asked with eyebrows arched.


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