Naked and Lost
The air was pungent and full of smoke. My nostrils were working overtime to deal with the overpowering smell of beer, tobacco and human sweat. I lifted my head from the beer-drenched table top and ran my fingers through my wet scalp.
Since coming to the conclusion that Captain Silver was a kingpin in drug running and illegals smuggling activities - and a murderer - I'd kinda gone off on a bender.
Kinda gone off on a bender was like expecting triplets and saying you're kinda pregnant. Who was I kidding. I'd done some serious damage to my liver, not to mention a few brain cells.
The last thing I remember is ordering another Pabst test - my nickname for a whiskey with a Blue Ribbon chaser. And then things went dark.
I wasn't wearing a handkerchief on my head but nevertheless my brain hurt. Seven jackhammers pounding in concrete couldn't compete with what was going on in my brain. As I squinted open my eyes I was immediately hit by bright sunlight. Not good. I quickly shut my lids, turned away from the source of light and tried again. My God, I was naked…and lost.
Where in hell was I and where were my clothes.
"And how are we doing now Sweet Cheeks?"
I knew that voice. But could I place it?
"You did yourself some major damage last night. Joe, who calls himself Paddy, called me about 2am this morning and I went and picked you up?"
"Dylan?"
"Yes, it's me, Studly."
Yes it was her. Although the last thing I was feeling was studly.
I wasn't lost after all - at least physically. "Where are my clothes" I croaked.
"I trashed them" said Dylan. You were a walking fire hazard. Had you passed by a lit match those things would have gone up in seconds. I think you had more beer on your clothes than in your belly - if that's possible."
"Coffee" I was able to say. I had to sober up because I needed a clear head to filter fact from fiction.
We're getting down to the short strokes in our little tale. See what strokes my pals took today by checking out their stuff over at We Work For Cheese.
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Ok. Going home now.