Skip to main content

The Half-way Mark of this Bloody February Writing Thing - Day 14


It Has To Be Aliens

I was just coming out of  Daffy Dill's, the florist where I'd bought a bouquet of Bluebells to give to Dylan for Valentine's, when I saw him. There was no mistake about it. He had a long face, wide-set eyes, big teeth, a flowing mane and he kind of trotted as he moved in and out of pedestrians on the sidewalk across the street.

"Halt" I yelled and drew my pistol. I had no choice but to pitch the flowers as I took up the chase. A homeless woman, in whose lap I'd thrown the flowers gazed at me longingly. He was about a block ahead of me and as I picked up speed his trot quickly became a gallop. As we turned a corner and descended a set of stairs horse face was in the lead and I was on the rail.

And then he was gone. "What the…". Just like that he had disappeared.

Where the hell did he go I thought. "It has to be the aliens and their tractor beam" I said aloud as passers by started to stare at this wild-eyed, dishevelled dick mumbling something about aliens. "What?" I said to no one in particular. "Happens every day. Aliens just pluck people off the street just like that."

Of course I didn't believe it. The statement was more a coping mechanism than anything else. But he had disappeared. And right before my eyes. But I had seen him. I knew what he looked like now. And I'd describe him to the sketch artist and we'd paper the city with that artist's depiction. It was only a matter of time before we caught him. That is if the aliens let him go first.

"Holy hell, that's it" I exclaimed and in one of those "Damn I could have had a V-8" moves I slapped myself.

Aliens. Illegal aliens. It has to be the aliens!

Before the aliens get you check out the links at We Work for Cheese for how the rest of my blogger buddies handled today's prompt.

Comments

Linda R. said…
Those aliens are sneaky little devils, but I'm sure they'll be no match for Jack once he's had his V-8.
nonamedufus said…
He might have to drink two glasses.
Cadeaux said…
I'd like to have that V-8 and put a lot of vodka in it please. Aliens don't know what to make of vodka - clear like water but magical in a way.
Linda Medrano said…
I never knew you could be so hard boiled. Aliens, huh? Illegal ones? Do you have them in Canada? Isn't it a bit too cold for them there?
nonamedufus said…
Well, sure we get aliens. Our government just passed legislation to make it harder to become a Canadian. And you thought we were a loving, open, multi-cultural society? Not any more it seems.
ReformingGeek said…
Sigh. So much hate for the poor aliens. Let's all sit around the campfire and sing kumbaya. The horses will take the soprano.
mike said…
It coulda been aliens, or maybe it was that open manhole.
nonamedufus said…
When I think of sitting around the campfire the last thing I think of is Kumbaya. The first thing I think of is… http://youtu.be/R6dm9rN6oTs
nonamedufus said…
Damn, Mike, now you've destroyed my suspenseful dramatic effect.
frankleemeidere said…
At the half, Stooge Hand still out in front, Apartment House is second with plenty of room, Assault is passing Battery -- Assault and Battery -- Notary Sojac is fourth, And in last place by 10 lengths, I believe it is, yes it is ... Beetlebomb
nonamedufus said…
I think you and I are brother of different mothers. I have that Spike Jones bit on an old LP. It's one of my favourites.

http://grooveshark.com/s/Beetlebomb/1j8Qlt?src=5
frankleemeidere said…
Wonderful! Oddly enough, my wife and I have often been mistaken for brother and sister -- even by those who know we're married. (I have no idea why -- we don't look alike at all.) Rather than correcting them (because I have an evil mind) I'd tell them that we're not full siblings, because while we had different fathers, our mothers weren't the same. It was fun watching them parse through that.
frankleemeidere said…
I'd have to say that most space aliens are also illegal aliens, unless they've gone through the proper channels to get landed immigrant status or something. And I don't think man of them do that -- the forms are bad enough to fill out if you come from another country on Earth. Think of what they'd be like for someone from Alpha Century.
MalisaHargrove said…
Daffy Dill's? I love it! We think alike on store names. We were also thinking alike with our illegal alien angle. Great minds.
nonamedufus said…
You and your wife sound like the White Stripes. I could never figure out if they were married or brother and sister, Does your wife play drums?
nonamedufus said…
Well when you put it like that I'd have to agree.
nonamedufus said…
All's fair in love and fiction.
Ziva said…
Damn aliens, always messing with people's plans.
nonamedufus said…
I know, eh.

I'm not sure if anyone got my Genesis reference. Maybe I'm getting too obtuse for my own good.

http://youtu.be/_61hzuGGJX0
The aliens picked me up a few days ago, too. They finally set me back down so I could catch up with what's going on here.
meleahrebeccah said…
I'm cracking up at the "Damn I could have had a V-8"line!

Also - I hope you find horse face soon and that he wasn't really abducted by aliens!
nonamedufus said…
V8 100% juices aren't just delicious—they are an excellent source of vegetable nutrition that's essential to your well-being.

Popular posts from this blog

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born.  That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network.  And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard.  But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door.  And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran.  The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993.  I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share.  The formula was pretty simple.  A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains.  The show opened as follows... Imagination Day!  Oh boy! ...

Hello Goodbye

Today a bit of a reflective piece. Rather than being funny, this is  about the funny. It's a day of mixed emotion at nonamedufus . You see, after several months of inactivity I've dropped a couple of former blogger buddies off my blog roll. I kept hanging on and hanging on hoping they'd return to active blogging but, alas, after waiting in one case five months I've decided to let them go. I'm going to miss - going to? I have been missing - Margo at the Screaming Me-Me . She was one funny lady. From time to time she and I would engage in a feud or two for several days at a time but it was all in fun both for us and, I think, for our readers. And we'd leave each other funny comments, poking fun at each other. I miss her friendship and our humorous exchanges. The other blogger I'm letting go is Chelle, The Offended Blogger . Chelle was a special lady. In addition to her own blog she created and managed Humor Bloggers Dot Com where humour bloggers like m...

The Dangling Conversation

There's a debate underway in my household between my wife and I. I say "underway" because it hasn't quite reached the "raging" stage. If you want raging, my wife (a Francophone) and I (an Anglophone) from time to time (usually in a weak moment of my own making) slip into our number one discussion around why we don't speak more French at home - ergo - when am I, a former public servant who learned French at the expense of our gracious taxpayers and was technically rated bilingual (even though I hardly used it), going to improve my use of Canada's other language? This one never gets resolved, hence it's ongoing nature. But the current debate is over a remark I casually made the other day. I'm no geek, but with a lot of time on my hands I surf the web, converse on Facebook and such and - I have to admit - "I'm nonamedufus and I'm a Twitterholic". In an epiphany-like moment I was struck by the apparent impact of social networkin...