If You Gotta Go, Go Now

So I'm at the drugstore sitting, waiting for my prescription to be filled. I need some antibiotics for a cold and some medication to boost my chemo regime. There's these three chairs for people to use when they're waiting and next to them is a blood pressure machine. I suppose it's there to make us all fell guilty that we haven't been checking our pressure on a regular basis. Who me?

So, anyway I'm sitting there and across from me, staring me in the face is an aisle full of incontinence products. Yeah, you know, those plastic pants one can wear under their normal clothes.

To me, incontinence is largely associated with getting old. It's a serious condition, an embarrassing one, and I suppose these products go a long way in hiding this malady.

But I had to smirk as I read the wrappers that packaged up these medical marvels.

For instance one was titled "Active" and I thought, hey, just how active can an 80 year old be? Hell, I'm in my 60s and you think you can get me off the couch? Well, maybe if you waved a cheeseburger under my nose.

The next label was "Anywhere". Okay, fair enough, if you've got a peeing problem it could hit anywhere.

But the one that really killed me was the package with the label "Serenity". "Serenity"? Hell, if I have to pee in public the last thing I'm gonna feel is serene.

The other night Mrs D and I were watching the Food Network when one of these ads came on. She turned to me and said "Why is it only women seem to have this problem?" Now, I want to preserve my marriage. So, I didn't make some flip comment I merely shrugged. But she's right. It seems in the land of television advertising only women pee their pants.

Go figure.

You know I think these plastic pants people missed a perfect opportunity when they ignored using a big hit from the 60s for their advertising campaign. Yeah, see for yourself...

So finally, after 15-20 minutes of staring at plastic underpants my prescriptions were ready.

Good thing. I really had to go now.