Skip to main content

Just Don't Poop


Mrs Dufus and I were watching our daily post-dinner fare on the big screen last night when after being bombarded by ads for Robillard Hearing Aids (Hi Julia! - it's a local thing), Chip Reverse Mortgages and Acorn Stair Lifts I turned and remarked "you know, I think only old people watch TV these days". It seems all the ads are aimed at people of my advanced age, and older. Well, except for the local radio ads that pump out formats of millennium musical miss-mash. God I'm old.

And then I reflect on just where I'm at. Let's see, chemo, renal diet, daily weight and blood pressure readings, taking my blood sugar three time a day for my diabetes. hearing aids, endless pills in the morning and at night, etc., etc, etc.

So maybe those ads are targeted at me. Not Mrs D 'cause she's not as old as I am - she keeps reminding me.

It's gotten to the point I've seen those Stair Lift ads so often I can almost recite them from memory. In fact I like to talk along with the narrative. Like with that guy of a certain age who likes to say "And I'm the king of my castle again" and then later in the ad he and I say to each other "And I was surprised at just how little it cost." I think this is a good thing. That and my daily crossword puzzle exercise my brain. Like when I shout at the television  ay 7:30 "THIS IS JEOPARDY" and "AND NOW HERE IS THE HOST OF JEOPARDY ALEX TREEEEE-BECK". I know. I need a life.

But the most inane thing about that ad - remember I've fallen and I can't get up? - well this is almost as stupid. It's when the announcer intones at the outset of the ad "Just don't fall". Makes complete sense to me. Oh, wait, you're selling a product? Oh, okay.

I'm waiting for the day when they make that chair lift a commode chair. You know, for even older folks who can't make it all the way up the stairs to the bathroom in time. The announcer will intone "just don't poop" at the outset of the ad for a product they'll likely name the Apoop Stair Lift.

I wonder where they'll put the toilet paper.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born.  That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network.  And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard.  But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door.  And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran.  The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993.  I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share.  The formula was pretty simple.  A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains.  The show opened as follows... Imagination Day!  Oh boy! ...

30 Days of Photos III #4 Sour

Check out Ziva's Inferno for the rest of today's photos.

I Am Charlie, I'm A Bore

Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Mel Gibson, Tom Cruise, Colin Farrel...you know the list, it goes on and on. The list of Hollywood hick-ups who not content to meltdown behind closed doors have to drag each and every detail out into the light of day and share it with all of us. Well, add Charlie Sheen to that luckless and lascivious list of losers. In the past few days he's been on every major media soapbox complaining abut how he's been treated and how he's misunderstood. Last night he spent an hour on ABC's 20/20 "in his own words". Charlie, you should have stuck to the script. "I have a highly evolved brain". You know I never did like that song by Helen Reddy in the 70s "I Am Woman". But I have to say the melody really leant itself well to a parody of Hollywood's latest flame-out, Charlie Sheen. Although I never thought I'd hear myself say this, my sincerest apologies to Helen Reddy. And now if you're ready (a little play on wor...