The Six Degrees of Heaven

One day Anthony died and awoke at the gates of heaven. "I'm in" he no sooner thought to himself when a booming, castigating voice said "Not so fast Anthony. It's not as simple as that". Anthony turned in search of the voice and stopped when he came across a less than five footed bearded man in flowing white robes.

"You Peter? laughed Anthony. "That's right my son and that laugh is already one strike against you."

"Oh I'm so sorry St Peter. Please forgive me. But understand you weren't what I was expecting."

"That's not all you weren't expecting" said Peter with a wink of his eye. "Heaven is split into six sections and we decide which section arrivals will be placed. Follow me and I'll explain."

Peter called for a golf cart and took Anthony on a little excursion.

Their first stop was Eh Heaven. "That's where all the Canadians are" said Peter. "Of course, eh" exclaimed Anthony. "Now you're gonna tell me you provide them with poutine and Molson Ex forever." "No I'm not" said Peter. "But we do provide crueller donuts and double-double coffees from Tim Horton's".

They then proceeded to Bee Heaven. "That's where all the beekeepers are directed" said Peter. "It's not a large place but those guys do such good work keeping bees alive we thought they should be rewarded appropriately, so we hived off a portion of heaven just for them." "Sweet idea" countered Anthony.

"Next up is Sea Heaven and if you hadn't guessed that's where the world's sailors are sent. We keep them afloat for all of eternity," said Peter, "on water from the Sea of Galilee".

"Over there is D for Danish heaven. Guess who we direct there."

"And on your right is E for Everybody Else heaven. And that's where you're going. Don't worry it's a nice place to spend the rest of your life."

"But you said there were six levels of heaven. Where's the sixth?"

"Ah" said St Peter, once they've figured it out folks aren't too exited about it. Look."

My God - oops sorry there St Peter - everyone's face is blurred and replaced with the sixth letter of the alphabet. Why is that?" questioned Anthony.

"This" whispered Peter "is F heaven. For those that can't contain themselves up here and in their excitement use the F word this is where they're sent and F faced."

"Fuck" exclaimed Anthony "that's a terrible pun. Oops"

Over at Studio30+ they went with efface/erase as a prompt this week. Bet you're wishing I'd efface this post, eh?

My Back Pages - October

Well, folks, I read seven (count 'em) seven books in October. One I didn't finish but even at that I hit the magic number 50 I estimated for myself by the end of the year. The six books I successfully waded through were, firstly, What Happened, Hillary Clinton's book on her bid for the Presidency. I''m a bit of a political junkie so I get off on this stuff but still it kinda struck me as one long whine over losing. Next up was the excellent Canyon of Dreams: The Magic and Music of Laurel Canyon. Laurel Canyon was the fabled area outside of Los Angeles where many musicians and artists lived. Known as a 60s enclave, the book takes a look at just who lived there over the last 80 years. A fascinating read. Next up was Lightfoot, a biography of Canadian folk singer Gordon Lightfoot. He may have been responsible for some iconic folk songs but he was also quite the womanizer and boozer. Enough said. Then I read Dan Brown's new tome Origin, the fifth ...

The Polka Dot Door

A long time ago, when I was 22, my first child was born. That kid grew up on a little Canadian kid's show called Polka Dot Door, produced by the TV Ontario network. And Dad, more often than not, sat through those shows with his little one. Nine or so years later when a brother, and a year after that when a sister came along number one son was moving on to Knight Rider and The Dukes of Hazzard. But there was a nice overlap where his siblings picked up where he had left off with Polka Dot Door. And Dad was right there to welcome them. So you're looking at a Polka Dot Door veteran. The show began in 1971 and ran to 1993. I didn't watch the full run but I did get in my fair share. The formula was pretty simple. A young male and female host, which seemed to change every week, sang songs, told stories, made crafts and generally did their best stimulate little brains. The show opened as follows... Imagination Day! Oh boy! ...

30 Days of Photos III #4 Sour

Check out Ziva's Inferno for the rest of today's photos.

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